(The potions professor ))
by abrahmpotter
Summary: harry potter is about to begging another year as a professor of defense the dark arts when a knew member joins the staff his former enemy Draco Malfoy. after complications with Malfoy s room harry will be forced to live with him but can they get along? (drarry)
1. Chapter 1 the new professor

Chapter 1: the new professor

Harry sat in the great hall looking out into the tables that started to fill with students wondering what another year teaching at Hogwarts would hold.

He was exited and anxious to get back to work he was a professor of defence against the dark arts. people always thought he would grow up be an auror or something but harry had decided he was done with fighting. He didn't want to go around catching bad guys all day; and after all who better to teach defence the dark art that the boy who lived. He absolutely loved the job, and he was always caring for his students and Hogwarts made him feel at home.

The great hall started to buzz with life he saw a few familiar faces of students that waved to him from the house tables. An enthusiastic Gryffindor waved to harry as a shy ravenclaw hid behind her. He smiled. And chatted up to Hagrid who told him all about the new strange creature he had been caring for during the summer that harry count learn the name of for the life of him, Neville joined in a few minutes latter suggesting hagrid some things about plants that again harry could understand either; but it didn't matter know he felt at home. Most of all harry was also curious ; there was new potions professor joining the Hogwarts staff; and even with Harrys insane pestering McGonagall had not disclosed who it was.

Slughorn had just finally retired the year before to have his much deserved retirement and so the position was empty, it was also said that it was someone harry knew witch made him even more curios to who this mystery person would be. But it wouldn't be long till he found out. And the empty seat besides him was reserved for the new member of the staff. Suddenly the hall went silent; as the doors opened and the first years entered they looked at the great hall In amassment. The sorting began. Antoinette Emilia Sanderson "Neville read from a list of students a tiny girl with long blood hairs and freckles hesitantly sat on the chair. "HUFFELPUFF" the hat Roared after a few seconds. Form the table came screams cheers. A few more children passed two ravenclaw 3 Gryffindor's and another huffelpuff latter and another name was called "alexander Dermot" a pale skinny boy move hesitantly forward "SLYTHERIN" the hat roared after what seemed like an excruciatingly long time. The hall was quiet. A few cheers came from the slytherin table but only a few. And he walked with his head down and took his seat. Something had ben broken. It felt wrong that thing like this happened still. Harry count help but feel bad for the boor boy.

The sorting continued, the last girl went to ravenclaw and then McGonagall stood up. "welcome" she said her voice echoed on the walls of the hall "to all the new students and the old one I wish the best for thins new school year that begins I do have some announcements to make; first of all; I would like to remind you all about the zones of limits in the castle; including the forbidden forest and the high towers unaccompanied. As well as remind you all; that some areas are being reconstructed still therefore entrance is forbidden. that being said, I would also like to personally introduce the members joining the staff this year. Mr Neville longbottom will be taking over as the new herbology professor." Neville stood up an the students clapped. "as well" McGonagall continued "as you all know professor Slughorn is no longer joining us reason why potions will be know thought by a MR – "harry turned to his right he could believe who he was seeing standing next to McGonagall "Draco Malfoy" she said so it was him.

Most student applauded polity but everyone seemed to be slightly shooked. "now enough of announcements let the feast begin" McGonagall finished and food materialized in all the tables and the hall filled with conversation. Draco Malfoy filed the chair next to harry. Harry didn't know what to say and the only thing he managed to say was "Malfoy?" "the one and only" he replied. Harry was really struggling to be an adult about the hole situation he could talk to Malfoy he wasn't a teen ager anymore. "so how has everything been" he asked politely "better" Draco replied "and you potter" "actually great" "well I'm glad" Draco said and they only exchanged a few other words during the dinner.

The next couple of days were probably equally as awkward; they didn't talk much there was still stuff that need to be addressed. But harry was doing his best to treat him nicely and keep his composure. It was nearing the end of the week when harry came across two realisations; one the elephant in the room had to be addressed and two; he decide it was time to give Draco a second chance. He wouldn't be his friend but a decent working relationship was all he wanted not more. Just respect. That was it. There of he decided to talk to Draco that Sunday night at dinner. "look Malfoy" he told him. "I just want you to know there is no hard feelings okay" he saw Draco's face changed "please lets be grown ups abut thins okay" Draco nodded; he looked slightly confused for the sudden change in the conversation but I was fine "I would actually really appreciate that" Draco said "so lets start over, forget about everything how about that " harry said "I'm not the person I used to be I can assure you that" Draco said "hello my name is harry potter" Draco laughed "ok fine" he said "Draco Malfoy nice to meet you". Perfect though harry. and just like that the awkward conversation shifted to something's a bit less awkward but awkward none the less. But They slowly found shared interests in books and music, and started to rather enjoy talking to on another.

Another week went by; when the unexpected happened. It was 5 in the morning and Draco was sat in the principals office waiting for an update. The headmistress entered the room "bad new I'm afraid" she said sitting in her desk "I have already got someone to work on it but it does not seem to have an easy solution." "well and what know" Draco asked "well will see but if its not fixed by today I'm afraid you will have to be relocated to some other room" just what I need my room flooding great way to star the week "Draco mustered under his breath. "it isn't ideal but ill see what I can do; I would advice you to get ready for today Mr. Malfoy" she said "ill meet with you when I have something figured out; but all the wings are currently occupied or under reconstruction; so I warn you know that sharing might be a possibility." Draco mutter something else under his breath "very well then" Draco sais coldly "thank you" he said walking out the door; still soaking wet. "fucking merpeople, who In the name o Salazar slytherin though it would be an incredible idea to make underwater rooms in the territory of the merpeople" he cursed as he walked down the halls towards one of the prefects bathrooms. Soaking wet.

He changed, into clean clothes; "thank the gods for house elves" he though and wandered the hall till breakfast. His day wasn't great, at around lunch time he was called to the principals office "I have found a temporary solution" she said "as I said I'm afraid it wont be of your liking" Draco sighted she continued speaking "there are no empty wings at the moment; I do have two options for you" `great` Draco thought to himself `just fantastic`. "so there is an empty room near the ravenclaw common room and the space is just as big as where you where before. but professor Trelawney is right next door." `Not happening in a million years` Draco though.

"and the second option is" he questioned anything would be better than Trelawney at this point. "there is another living space; is in one of the newest towers the one next to the Gryffindor tower, it is slightly smaller and you will share a living room" she said "and who is currently there?" Draco asked "Mr potter" o great so its bat shit crazy Trelawney or saint potter. Draco though he count help but feel the universe had something against him. "as I said, I will give you time to think, but remember its only temporary" she added. Draco delivered his options. "ill go with potter" he announced the reasoning was that potter probably wasn't as insane and could objectively be a better roommate. Still he didn't like it. "very well" she said Draco left to find his new place.

Draco entered the room praying that potter hadn't finished his classes yet thankfully it seemed he hadn't. The view was stunning; the tower rose over the lake and looked out into the mountains. At least something good came out of all of it he thought. He made found his stuff in the living room. the living room wasn't very big it had 2 scarlet couches. And two book self's that rose two the celling, one at each side of the marble chimney with the Gryffindor logo craved at the top. And huge windows framed the room giving a view to the grounds. `this place could use some remodelling` Draco thought. He hopped it would at least be an ice barker. Half an hour latter. Harry walked trough the door to find the living room cover in green and silver apparel "what the heck" he said "you like it potter" Draco said smirking, harry didn't seem mad "I let you into my space to find this, typical Malfoy" harry says jokingly, "well funny prank you got me" harry said "now make it all go away" "how boring of you" Draco said and with a flick of his want the room is back to normal.

Harry showed Draco where he would be sleeping and helped him move his stuff over. "so since you are going to be living here" harry says "couple of rules- one always knock; you know basic stuff. Don't make a mess, if you have an owl or cat or what ever I don't want it making a mess, and you cant take stuff for the book shelf's but maintain the order, and also if you damage any of my books I will kill you" harry says "yes captain" draco jokes, "ok no but sure ill do my best" "very well, well I have to go se you latter" harry said and headed out the door. This sure is going to be a strange year. He thought to himself as he walked down the stairs.

hello thank you for reading: if you like the story let me know to post more chapters; i have it all amos written all out; but i just want someone to show interest and ill post it all. its long. lol anyway hope you like it.


	2. Chapter 2 hallway rumours

Chapter 2: hallway rumours

it wasn't a surprise to anyone that by the second week the whole school know of the situation; for them it has been uneventful, they tried to avoid each other as much as humanly possible but still there was speculation as to why Malfoy was suddenly seen leaving Harrys tower so often and the rumours in fact where hilarious they went from your usual omg they are totally hooking up to insane and elaborate secret society conspiracies and yet none of the got close to the truth. By the second week some bold students had had the courage to ask both Draco and harry about this, and them being as they where decided to make fun of the situation, giving a different story every time.

"oh yes me and potter are definitely a thing know I mean have you seen his muscles "

"Malfoy?, oh well you know Malfoy owns me so he is now my personal assistant"

"no, me and potter are building the next generation of super magical warriors"

"you know Malfoys golden locks are gorgeous, have I ever told you that"

"we are trying to revive people, Frankenstein style"

"we are secret agents now"

"Malfoy and I are going treasure hunting"

"potter? What about him I have no idea what you are talking about"

"he's secretly a merman but shh don't tell anyone"

"we are building Hogwarts first swim team"

"Malfoy, me and him are definitely a thing, he is a really good kisser"

"me and potter are rehearsing for a musical"

"I'm helping potter campaign to become prime minister"

but the third week, students where stopping them in the corridors, and both harry and Draco enjoyed mocking students by occasionally holding hands down the halls, other professors started to join.

"I heard harry is planning on asking Malfoy to marry him" Neville commented on one of his classes

"I heard they have created a secret organisation; yes of course I'm part of it" principal McGonagall told some students

"yes I'm part of the musical production" added professor Flitwick to the discussion "we are doing wicked, spoiler alert, harry is elphaba, and well Malfoy you can guess with that hair"

"I never though harry would end up with Malfoy, doesn't surprise me seeing how much he talked about him back in the day" Hagrid said to some curios students

the issue even made it into the daily prophet, the headline read, "the boy who lived got himself a new chosen one?" _"Harry potter seems to be creating quite the topic of conversation, regarding the rumours that involve a former enemy and now co worker; non other than Draco Malfoy. Numerous reports say they have been seen around Hogwarts suspiciously close. Is this the new Hogwarts budding romance?"_ when valentines day came around harry was seen all day caring a bouquet of roses, that read for my chosen one in the card Malfoy got his 3 period lesson interrupted with a terribly ironic love poem, delivered by the valentines day goblins. after a while the rumours died down, considering the daily prophet reporters gave up in trying to write a coherent story. Every student gave up asking as soon as they realized, the where never going to know the real story. Harry and Draco where eventually given weird looks of heard murmuring once they walked down the hall. Nothing to out of the ordinary. A few weeks latter Draco found out there had been more complication with the room, it looked like he would be staying with potter for the rest of the school year.

A few months latter It a was a sunny April morning, Draco woke up late that Saturday he heard the water running, and harry singing Draco had found he did that when he thought no one was listening, he hadn't teased him about it because he was afraid he might stop doing it and he found it quite cute. no he didn't have a thing for potter, at least not anymore back in his Hogwarts day well that was a different story. But it wasn't like he was very god at hiding it back then. His friends still teased him about it to this day, it had became sort of and inside joke with the ones he remained in touch with after the war. Yes Draco was gay, but the whole word knew that already; he came out a few years after the war when everything was settling down, and tried not to make big fuzz about it, still if you are a Malfoy, specially the Draco Malfoy, his coming out eventually made it into the daily prophet.

After the war no one gave a damn anyway, it wasn't like they cared much about it war puts perspective on people, they cared much more about hating him for his last name than for it. Of course there where still people who didn't like it very much, but he didn't care anyway, he despised his father and his opinion and he was in Azkaban anyway, and his mother well she was serving the ministry for her actions but Draco got to se her every once in a while. Draco was fine and he felt really good to finally be able to do whatever he pleased ; well his last name didn't put a very good name for him the wizarding world but that didn't stop him and he was grateful to be allowed to be authentic to himself over the years he had had a few relationships but none worked out.

Still it felt good to finally have a bit of a normal life, and being able to have a boyfriend or a normal steady job and a normal house felt nice. Not that he hadn't had a few boyfriends at his time at Hogwarts but he didn't have to hide them anymore, as he did back in the day because imagine the scandal it would have been of anyone found out that Draco Malfoy was with ravenclaws head boy. And had made out a few times with the keeper of huffelpuffs quidditch team. Or that he had a thing with dean Thomas, (how wasn't even a pure blood and was black) (dean was now married to Seamus though but neither had ever talk about it anyone). Draco was really grateful before he couldn't even dream of a future for himself, doing what he wanted to do and even if everyone in the world still despised him it didn't matter because there was few who where kind and that was enough.

Draco hear a knock on his door, "are you awake?" potter asked punishing the door open Draco notice he was still in only a towel "yeah" Draco answered with a sleepy voice "do you want breakfast?" harry asked him "isn't it to late know to go eat" Draco sat up in his bed "yes but I can make some if you want, you'll have to do it yourself or starve if you say no" harry said "in that case yes thank you" Draco replied he could help to look at harry, again he didn't like him but it wasn't like he could deny he was handsome, and Malfoy new a good one when he saw it. For the rest of the day Draco couldn't shake the image of harry in a towel.

On Tuesday night Draco was sitting in the couch reading when harry came in the room late night with Neville, who apparently was panicking, harry sat Neville in the table and gestured Draco to come help him "wow what happened" he asked, "nothing he is just nervous" harry replied "and why is that" "I'm proposing to Alice, on Friday" Neville said "she is going to say yes for gods sake" Draco said "I know for a fact Mr romantic potter here planed something she cant say no to" "but what if something goes wrong" Neville exclaimed "it wont, know if you don't mind I've had enough whining for one day" Draco turned around and headed to his room.

This was all fucking stupid the girl was going to say yes, heck with the proposal potter planed Draco would have said yes as well, he went all out scavenger hunt, slash musical number, slash flowers and fairly lights. Draco deeply wished someday someone would love him enough to do such a thing, okay he was a bit hopeless romantic, not as much as potter and he tried to keep it hidden but he secretly loved everything , the flowers the cheesy letters and all the other things.

He fantasied about a romantic guy who went all out like potter did. But of Couse he never said anything, not like he had many friends to chat about the guy of his dreams to anyway. at this point in time harry was his closest friend witch was odd, yes they where friends and Draco had told him about his ex boyfriends and stuff, but well boys weren't their preferred topic of conversation, to say the least, and Draco also didn't feel like going all out in describing the man of his dreams to potter he probably would have laughed in his face. And it would have been a bit awkward considering he had many of qualities Draco liked, but still he didn't like him like that.


	3. Chapter 3 worse than Lockhart

Chapter 3: worse than Lockhart

Friday evening Draco found himself putting up lights and Laying rose petals around a tree near the dark lake, potter had somehow managed to drag him along to help him decorate for the proposal thankfully he still had enough self respect to not have accepted to participate in the dance number, so potter had gathered a bunch of students to help him instead. by dawn everything was ready and all that was left was to wait for Neville and Alice to show up, Draco sat by the lake where Alice wouldn't see him if she came before he had time to hide, he had never been in the lake at this time of the day before and the view was beautiful the mountains and the castle contrasted with the skies coloured in orange and red that reflected on the surface of the lake like it was a mirror.

Draco didn't realize that potter was sitting next to him for a while maybe because he had been incredibly quiet probably to scare him to death when he decided to make a noise, or probably because he just could be bothered to talk and was enjoying the sunset and the quiet alone with his thoughts. This idea let to Draco wondering what he was thinking about. What when on inside of harry potters head, he (contrary to popular believe) was really a mystery, his opinions where well developed and he had a very peculiar way of seeing things his vision of the world had been altered a bit probably by his past and now he had become (a bit) more observant of the beauty and mysteries around him.

probably because after the war was over he had finally been able to discover what life was really about, with out war. Draco had noticed he could sit hours just staring at the window and thinking, and when presented with an interesting question he gave it a lot of thought and enjoyed rich discussions , both him and Draco would stay long hours in the night sitting on their couch talking, about life about stars about anything and eventing sharing their personal opinions, and their ideas. don't get the wrong idea though he was still a reckless idiot, but something had changed deep within him, maybe something's do change us forever and leave deeper scars than does we see on the surface.

He also suffered, he suffered a lot, of course he wanted no one to notice, but Draco heard him pacing around the living room in the middle of the night after waking up in cold sweat from a nightmare, sometimes he would walk into the kitchen and notice his eyes where red from crying, he would notice when a noise made him flinch his head and close his eyes trying not to remember, he felt so much pain, he had found him sitting on the sofa curled up with a cup of coffee staring at the walls, he could hear him screaming on the shower and whispering names in his sleep. Sometimes it was better and sometimes worse, Draco new how much it hurt him how much he still cared he still hurt he still was sacred. Everyone Was left everyone with memories but no wonder for him it was worse.

Draco had his own problems as well he also had nightmares he could barely sleep sometimes and he still cried when he saw his arm, he found himself wondering in the astronomy tower crying in the middle of the night for what he had done and couldn't go there with out picturing Dumbledore's live less eyes, but the burden that potter carried was so much heavier, it clamed his thoughts it took his energy and his happiness, and yet he shone trough it all with a smile on his face knowing to appreciate the little things like sun sets and love, he pulled trough his pain, it drained him so much but he was a fighter always keeping his optimism his kindness trough the darkest of moments. And Draco could not help but grow admiration for him for his strength, he was being so brave, braver that anyone he new and yet no one had a single clue of the battles he was still fighting, no one cared about the person behind the hero, he was the saviour never afraid, yet he was the one who was the most scared, to go to bed at night, and to wake up every morning, but no one is ever there to notice, the person behind the persona , to help pick up the broken pieces of the one who shattered to fix everything else that was broken.

A hero isn't a hero just because they are strong or do incredible things a hero is a hero because of how many things they is willing to compromise of their own, to ensure others live better than them and are safe, and that was why harry was the biggest hero, never letting anyone now who much he suffered but instead being a guide a friend for everyone who needed his help, to any sad student, or lonely teacher, to any scared veteran he was there. Always. Even to help plan ridiculous proposals, well like the one going on at the moment.

"its time" Draco told harry as he saw Neville and Alice drawing closer,

harry rushed to get everything started as Draco went to hide where he could pop out at the end of it all, his duty was to give her the flower bouquet at the end of the dance number, Neville made her sit on a chair and the madness began, there were students dancing and singing there where rose petals and pretty spells being cast, it was amazing, it was over as soon as it had started and Draco gave her the flowers and rushed out again to where harry and the rest where, Neville took Alice to the tree Draco and harry had spent all evening decorating and asked her to marry him, she of course said yes, tears rushing down her cheeks. Then everyone stood up and congratulated them and celebrated the engagement. Draco was tired so he excused himself as soon as he could and got to bed.

Not much happened the days following the proposal, in fact Hogwarts was unusually quiet for this time of the year, Easter festivities had flown by, and it was nearing the end of April, it was getting warmer out, and Draco enjoyed spending his evenings outside, he had arranged in his time in Hogwarts for some of the potions classrooms to be moved to empty classrooms out side of the chambers and he finally had some classes in naturally lit places, of course it was kind of annoying when you needed more of a certain ingredient to go all the way downs stairs to get it, but it was worth it just for the bigger space, and better ventilation to filter out smells. (he also had the classroom next to potters but that was off the point) It was apparent that there was finally some progress in the fixing of Draco's original room, but he had grown accustomed to having potter as his roommate, he secretly liked his company a lot and was happy he wasn't alone, in fact he wasn't sure he wanted to go back if they where ever able to fix it. He was even thinking of telling them to stop trying, of course he had yet to discuss this with harry. Mainly because he seemed to be really busy with O. and N.E. preparation. Or that was what he kept telling himself the real reason why was he was afraid harry wouldn't want the same thing. He pushed the thought to the back of his mind, it wasn't going to be ready soon, he didn't need to have that conversation yet, did he?

He arrived that night to the tower, to find harry in the bathroom throwing up

"oh god are you alight?" Draco asked concerned

"just sick I think" he responded

"ok lets get you cleaned up" Draco helped harry up once he was done throwing up. Then he took him to his room and sat him in his bed. "ok lets change that shirt"

"you don't have to, I'm really okay" harry protested

"you don't look okay to me, now look" he tossed harry a clean blue shirt "put this on and ill take you down stairs" and so harry did as he said, still arguing In the proses.

"I swear there is no need for any of this" he protested as they made their way out of the tower "its not a big deal"

"shut up, I'm trying to take care of you, or do you want to get sick"

"fine" harry finally resigned as they walked trough the infirmary doors after explaining the situation to madam pomfrey she examined harry.

"you've got a really terrible fever, Mr potter" she said "don't worry, you will be as good as new in a couple of days, but you should stay here for tomorrow at least, just so you can rest, and in order for me make sure is just a fever" she told harry "Mr Malfoy would you please inform the principal that harry wont be giving class tomorrow"

"yes ma'am" Draco nodded and left the infirmary and made his way to McGonagall's office.

"professor McGonagall" he knocked

"come in" she said " to what do I owe your visit tonight Mr Malfoy"

"madam pomfrey sent me to inform you that harry is sick and he will not be able to work tomorrow"

very well, Mr Malfoy thank you" she said "oh before you leave, you don't happen to know what classes harry had tomorrow" she asked

"I think he had 2 period with the 3 years, 4 with the 2 years, fifth with I think 6 years and something else's I not really sure it might be first period with the 7 years but I could be wrong"

"can you cover any of does" she asked

"well I have first and second period free" he responded

" would you like to take over" she asked

"I mean.. yeah sure why not"

"well then its done, Mr Malfoy you will take 1 and 2 tomorrow"

"goodnight professor" Draco said closing the door behind him wondering why he had accepted to do such a stupid thing, he had never taught a defence against the dark arts class, and he really didn't want to. Its not like he didn't knew about it, he Cleary knew a lot about the subject, (obviously) but he disliked it. why was he such an idiot.

What was the worst that could happen he thought. Actually a lot of things, you could kill a student but accident or some shit. No, he pushed that aside, the was a first time for everything, it was just two hours, if potter could handle it he could handle it.

Next morning he woke up ,and popped quick visit to harry, who already looked so much better that the night before. And then headed to the defence the dark arts class room, nothing extraordinary happened during the first period maybe seventh years couldn't be bothered anymore about anything anyway, and they where just to stressed about exams to care. on second period, hell broke loose he was giving a lesson to second years, when a girl got stuck in a mirror thing, (god knows how) she started to scream, in fear, scared everyone else, then someone knocked over a container full of spiders and it was almost worse than that time Lockhart left the pixies out and ran back in Draco second year. He finally got everything under control, but it was a nightmare, of course when harry found out at the end of the day he wasn't even mad he just laughed his ass off. And that was when Draco decided he would never cover for harry ever again.

Harry got out of the infirmary on Saturday evening, he was sitting by the fire, with a book for the time that Draco arrived, latter after a friendly game of quidicht with some other teachers and some seventh years.

"oh you are back!" Draco said excitedly

"yes it seems I survived" harry mocked him

"oh well look at you the boy who lived does it again" Draco said sarcastically, walking into his room to change harry laughed


	4. Chapter 4 magic works

a few hours latter Draco was sitting by the fire with a blanket listening to some old record

he had found in the bottom of a box, the weird sisters first album. harry had resumed his reading in the sofa behind him. "omg that song" Draco gasped, harry looked up he seemed to have recognised it too "isn't that the song from the yule ball, god I remember" harry said "yes, yes!" he exclaimed "they played that song right as the clock stroke to midnight, oh I really wanted to dance to it everyone seemed so in love" Draco said "why didn't you?" harry asked "because I was busy pretending to be straight" Draco laughed "but I really wanted to take that cute ravenclaw prefect out there to dance with me" he said nostalgically. " I never got to dance to it either" harry said "why?" Draco wondered "I was busy being a party popper because, remember cho hang, she hadn't gone with me" harry said "are you serious that is ridiculous you are and idiot" Draco laughed " oh sod off Malfoy I was 14 of course I was and idiot" they both laughed "you still are" "how dare you, idiot" harry replied.

Draco got up "will Mr harry potter, give me this dance" Draco extended his hand "oh well, only if Mr Draco Malfoy accepts how much of and idiot he is" "very well, Mr potter, I am and idiot, just not as much as you" they laughed and harry took Draco's hand. They danced around clumsily trough the living room Draco spinning harry around

" _This is your final chance To hold the one you love You know you've waited long enough"_

Harry and Draco keep dancing around the living room knocking things over and laughing. As the song neared to and end

" _Don't let this magic die The answer's there Yeah, just look in her eyes"_

Harry rested his head on Draco's shoulder and kept spinning around. And then the song was over, that also seemed to be the end of the record. They stayed in silence for few seconds just looking at each other, harry blurted out a laugh. "well my 14 year old self could never had for seen that" Draco laughed "anyway, mortal enemy, I'm going to bed" harry says, its funny to think of how much they used to hate each other "good night potter" Draco says, harry laughed and went to his room.

Next Monday night, harry was revising some exams after dinner, and Draco was correcting some potions papers. "so what are you doing in summer?" Draco broke the silence " I don't really know, probably going back to the burrow" harry replied "I might go on a trip or something but I don't know with who as Ron and Hermione just had a baby and well, everyone else is in happy relationships and I really don't feel like third wheeling" he alleged "what are you doing?"

"I probably will just visit my mother, and I was hoping to go somewhere warm on July, you know a vacation" Draco stated "I was thinking the Caribbean, or maybe California" he looked around distractedly as he marked an essay "yeah, of course I don't know who I would take with me, Astoria is planning her wedding but I'm hopping she will come and her fiancé too, and I was planning on going with Dan, but we both now how that relationship ended" Draco said, Dan was his last boyfriend and that hadn't ended very well to say the least.

"that sounds like fun, I hope everything comes together in the end" harry scraped his head and took a sip from his coffee "well, if you wish I bet you could join us" "Ill have too see, but I would love that"

he smiled and got back to his exam correction. The conversation died there. But harry kept wondering about the possibly of a summer trip with Draco for the next couple of days, he even commented the possibility to Hermione on a letter on wrote to her that Wednesday. She thought it was a great idea, Ron not so much, mainly because he still wasn't fond of Draco, something are quite hard to forget, harry didn't expect him to forget the past, Hermione was more flexible about the mater and of course and encouraged harry to go, an important factor in this was that she felt kind of bad because she was to busy with the baby to go out for summer. She also told harry it could be a good idea to tell Luna, to go as well as she had heard her comment that she wanted to go to the beach for summer but had no one to go with. As her fiancé was going to be in Australia studding magical creatures all of the summer.

A few days passed and it was the weekend, exams where almost over but, the potions, herbology, and transfiguration tests where left for the next week and Draco was rushing with preparations to make sure all the ingredients students needed where available, and he was also preparing multiple classrooms for the test. He came back late, to find harry was getting ready to leave.

"where are you going" Draco wondered

"to Hagrids for tea" harry putted his coat on "want to come?"

"oh no I'm really tiered, have fun"

"o come on it will be fun" harry encouraged him

"no, no its okay, I'm fine thanks"

"don't be so boring come on you wont die" harry said

"FINE" Draco agreed and they made their way to hagrids.

It was actually really nice to Draco's surprise hagrid and harry talked a lot, mostly about stuff Draco didn't know much about, but hagrid did his best to make him feel included in the conversation. Draco was still amazed by the ability to forgive some people seemed to have, hagrid was so kind to him, he didn't have to do so, he felt bad, he felt bad because he didn't deserve it. He had never deserved any of this after what he did and yet there he was, drinking tea like they had always been friends The boys thanked hagrid for everything and left.

"see that wasn't so terrible" harry told him "I have to admit it was kind of fun, hagrid is really nice" Draco muttered "I glad he had good time teaching, magical creatures this year" "he always talk about them" harry laughed "I guess he just really love what he does" harry speculated "anyway, I know you are tired, but I think I'm going to stay put here for a while I don't feel like going back in yet" "actually, I don't feel like going back inside either" Draco said " I was thinking that it is a really starry night to waste it inside" "I that case I suppose we could go sit somewhere" harry suggested " I was thinking, maybe by the tree of the proposal" "yeah sounds good to me" so they made their way. Harry conjured a few blankets and pillows to appear, and they laid in silence just looking at the stars.

Harry wondered what Draco was thinking sitting next him as he moved closer; he looked at the sky in awe; it made him feel clam; and he knew that from somewhere above them Sirius looked down on him from the brightest of the stars; that shone that night over their heads; and harry wonder what he would think if he saw him then. "Draco" he said no using his last name for the fist time Draco turned his head at him suspired to hear him call him that; but some how it sounded right "harry" he said "you where also named after a star right" harry asked; Draco nodded "a constellation actually; the dragon constellation" he pointed up "you see Sirius; up there the brightest star; to its right is Orion and then a little bit farther away form it there is the Draco constellation; formed by does I think 10 big stars" he said tracing with his wand a line" harry didn't say anything; but after that night; he didn't call him Malfoy anymore.

After a few minutes had gone by in silence , harry started to shiver. Draco got closer to him, harry didn't resit. With a flick of his wand Draco conjured another blanket over both of them, harry got closer to Draco, until they where side by side, Draco heart was racing, he wasn't very sure why, he got closer to harry, and looked at him, harry turned to face him and Draco stared into his eyes, they where beautiful, the green shone in the moon light. Draco moved his arm to hug harry, again he didn't resist he just got closer and rested his head against Draco's chest, Draco could feel his breathing on his neck, he feet his hear beating faster, harry started to slowly fall asleep, Draco staid there for a while, he decided to let him sleep for a little before going back inside, he knew harry hadn't been so quiet in his sleep for a while. He felt butterfly's in his stomach, it was at that moment everything made sense to him, of course he had been pushing the though aside for the past few months but he couldn't keep it anymore, he liked him, he liked him a lot, the stupid harry potter, the handsome harry potter, harry potter, yes Draco liked him.


	5. Chapter 5 stay

Chapter 5: stay.

Harry woke up the next morning in his room, he didn't remember very well how he had gotten there. He found Draco was sitting on the couch.

"how…?" "you feel asleep I brought you back inside later" Draco responded "oh" harry blushed "thanks" he said awkwardly and went back to his room. Draco had a very busy day and he kind of regretted having stayed up that late, but again he got to cuddle harry, so I guess it wasn't all that bad, he plunked into bed that night, his dreams where peaceful at first, he dreamed about him, about his black hair and his green eyes, he dreamed he was holding his hand as they walked down the Hogwarts halls. They where young, maybe 17, they where happy, they where friends. Then everything went dark, Draco saw himself looking down at his arm, at the mark, blood dripping from the mouth of the serpent that was ash back; as it was the day of the battle, not faded as it was today but in full colour and it burned witch mean he was alive and in full power.

he saw Dumbledore falling from the tower, then he was In the battle ground, he shot a killing curse, that hit some Hogwarts student, he saw the life leaving the girls face, he saw harry lying dead in hagrids arms, but he wasn't waking up, he never woke up, he was dead, Draco started screaming, "potter wake up" please harry don't be death! He cried, Voldemort voice repeated that harry potter had been defeated, that he had won "Draco come here" Voldemort had said inviting him to his side "NO" Draco screamed "IM NOT A DEATH EATER" he screamed in his dream "HARRY WAKE UP!"

– Draco was woken up, harry was there looking at him "are you okay?" he asked "oh thank god, just a bad dream ill be fine" Draco responded "you sure you where screaming a lot" harry said "was I, I'm sorry if I woke you up" "no I had a nightmare too you know its fine" they stayed in silence for a moment, non of them wanted to be alone "you didn't wake up, in my dream, he won" a tear fell down Draco's cheek, harry wiped the tear "its okay know, he didn't win, Draco you are not a death eater, you are good" harry told him

"why is everyone so forgiving, harry I don't deserve your kindness" he cried "don't say that, you didn't have a choice you did what you had to do, and you protected me, you lied to Bellatrix lestranges face to protect me" "I was a coward, I did everything just because I was afraid" "Draco, you are not a coward, you stood up to the dark lord, and to all the death eaters to fight by our side when I came back, you are not a death eater, you never where, you didn't have a choice" Draco was still crying "thank you harry, I really don't deserve any of this, you shouldn't even talk to me after all I did, I should be looked up" "forgives is more valuable and shows more than revenge, than resentment, but you also have to forgive yourself, you are not that scared 17 year old boy anymore" harry got up he was going to leave "wait" he turned around "please, stay" harry got into bed, they both needed the company more than they wanted to admit, harry wanted to stay, they needed each other.

it was delusional to think that someone will be the one to cure you of the nightmares of the fear, of the war that lived inside of them, but, some company always helped, someone to be near when you slept to protect form the nightmares. They new they would never be the same, harry would keep flinching at sounds for the rest of his life, he would never get rid of the memory of death faces on the stone floors, Draco would never be able to look at his arm with out remembering, hurting, he would never forget the screams of Hermione as Bellatrix tortured her and he did nothing, or the light fading from the girl he had killed. NO ONE was going to change that. but someone who understood the fear was better than nothing, they could guard each other from the nightmares. Draco feel asleep crying in Harrys arms, no one deserved harry potter, no one ever would, but Draco came to the realization that he had to try, he couldn't give him, up he would be the best person he could be.

The school year was over, it was the last day of classes, Draco finally had the courage to ask about the room think, harry didn't even care about it, he said it would be fun to have him as a roommate again the next year. Draco was happy, he was exited for summer, for the Caribbean with Astoria and her boyfriend, and most likely harry and Luna how where wanting to tag along but hadn't made their minds just yet, he was exited for what was to come in his life, and he really couldn't wait to go back to his tiny flat in London, god he loved that city so much, no he didn't live in the manor even though it was still technically his, he didn't want anything to do with it, he went eventually, but never because he wanted to, he still kept the property to his name, thinking maybe someday he could make something good of the horrible place and when his mother wasn't at the minister she stayed there.

Draco was also exited he was going to live with harry again the next year, and as much as he did not want to admitted the tower was a so much better place to live in than the dungeon even if he some nights missed the sound of water and the songs of the merpeople in the lake that had helped him sleep in terrible nights back in his 6th year. Draco closed his bags and left the castle behinds he walked to hogsmade to aparate in London, this was how most of the professors left Hogwarts, although some like harry the old fashioned potter preferred to go on the train.


	6. Chapter 6 lion bravery for the serpent

Chapter 6: a few to many piña coladas; and strike lion bravery for the serpent

Weeks passed, it was the day of the trip, harry and Luna had decided to come along with them, they all apareted in group a few steps from their hotel lobby in a small island in the Caribbean, Draco cheeked them into their rooms, Astoria and her boyfriend where staying in the same room while Draco Luna and harry had another room, they settled in and it was time to enjoy, they all rushed to the beach, and remained there till sundown, Draco, Astoria and her boyfriend went back inside soon after that while harry and Luna keep bothering at the pool, for a long time.

the next morning Draco harry and Luna headed out of the hotel early to go explore the forest, they walked around and even swam in a waterfall, where Draco attempted to swing himself with a rope over the water but the tree branch where the rope hanged from ended up braking, they also had a very intense water war, they returned to the hotel that night and showered, quickly as they where ruing late for dinner, at a really fancy restaurant Astoria had reserved for all of them, they sat it a table by the window that had an incredible view to the sea, next to the dance floor, there was a live band preforming some ballad type songs, and two couples slow dancing to a jazzy sounding beat, Luna was quick to talk about their adventures of the day during dinner, Astoria talked about the massage she gotten done, it was a fun night, the conversation moved along easily and light-heartedly

The dinner was magnificent, after few drinks Astoria and Logan went of to dance, Draco wanted to dance as well, it was no secret he loved dancing, he asked Luna to dance with him, they danced a few songs Luna wasn't a bad dancer herself, they had lots of fun, harry just sat in the side watching them have fun, he wasn't really exited to join along either as dancing wasn't his favourite thing in the world, he didn't despise, but he just wasn't very fond of it, as was Draco, but the inevitable was bound to happen as Luna dragged him in to join them, harry wasn't going to lie, he did have fun as the 5 of them danced in a circle to a more up beat song that the band was playing, harry got back to sitting a soon as he could, a few songs latter so did Draco and Luna. Draco had an idea pop into his head, it was nonsense he tried to convince himself and pushed the thought away, harry didn't like dancing either, no he wasn't going to do it, it was at that moment that harry in a completely unexpected matter asked Luna to dance with him. "come on Draco just one song, he wont bite" he thought to himself "plus is no different than dancing with Luna" "well. Expect you fancy him" he argued with himself.

Some time passed, about half an hour or so, They where all back at the table getting ready to leave, as Draco realized it was his last chance if he was indeed going to ask harry as they had agreed they would stay for this song and that was it, Draco gathered courage in a desperate search for Gryffindor like stupidity and lion bravery he took a sip of his drink (note that both him and harry were a little drunk by then) and finally said , "harry" he hesitated "as we are about to leave I was wondering if you would" harry didn't let him finish "sure, why not" harry took his hand and dragged him to the dance floor, they dance funnily to the up beat tempo, but the song ended very soon, the band started playing a slow ballad, Draco wasn't going to let go know, he pulled harry closer towards him, his heart threatening to leave his chest. And they danced, Draco didn't even notice that time had passed; or that the song that played wasn't really meant to be danced to but it didn't matter; and then it was over, they headed out of the restaurant with their friend, no one said anything about what had just happened.

A few days flew by, it was nearing the end of the week, and the vacation was getting to an end, Luna was sat on the balcony late at night, harry and Draco where going about their own business inside but it was almost time for dinner, "do you have any idea what she is doing?" Draco asked harry as they where getting ready to leave "no, she sometimes does that, you know she is strange that way" harry answered "you should go talk to her" Draco told him.

Harry got up and went to the balcony where Luna was sitting, "oh hello harry" Luna looked at him as he sat next to her "have I ever told you about the moon, did you know people used to believe it was made of cheese" she told him. "no you hadn't told me that before" "you've been a bit weird lately harry" she said "weird how" he asked "is just the energy around you is different harry" Luna said "I guess I've been felling kind of weird lately a lot going on you know" he told her not knowing what else to say "is it because of him?" she asked "no, I don't, - I really don't know" "I've seen the way he looks at you harry" "Luna I haven't told this to anyone at all not even to Hermione, but I think I don't know what this is I mean its to complicated" harry sighted "my mother used to say that if a river needs to flow then it will always find a way to even if it takes time, harry you just allow yourself to be" luna said "how do I do that, I just to many emotions, god damming Malfoy, always" "shh harry, its going to be all right allow yourself to feel and the rest will come next" she assuered him . Harry went to bed that night un able to stop thinking about how he felt. was Malfoy growing onto him more that he had originally intended; perhaps it was nothing; could it be?.


	7. Chapter 7 Oliver

Chapter 7: Oliver

It had been a few days since he had gotten home and harry was headed to Ron's and Hermione's home to stay for a couple of weeks, before the new school year started and he has desperately needing to talk to his best friends, especially to Hermione, she new she would help him, or at least listen, she always did and she always new what to do.

Still his emotion were to loud as so that night he packed all his stuff and decided to go out for a drink on his own. He went to a pub, a muggle one to avoid all the scandal that came when he went nearly anywhere where there where other wizards around. Had a few to many beers, was drunk frustrated and emotional. And He made eye contact with this guy, he was taller that him, had bold hair, and to drunk harry looked similar enough to a certain someone, and so long story short, they talked left to go dancing somewhere else and that night harry ended up making out with some random guy in the bathroom of a muggle night club.

He woke up the next morning hung-over, and shirtless in the couch of an apartment he didn't know, and started to panic, wondering if something else had happened and he just did not remember. "hello" he called, no answer `what on earth what I thinking, fuck´ he thought to himself. He got up and looked for his phone. It was 10 am, and he had a few missed calls from Hermione. Apparently a great picture of him drunkenly walking around London had made its way to the news. `great, fuck this´ "oh well look who is up" he hear a voice coming from the corridor. "how are you felling" "a bit of a headache but other than that fine" a few moments of awkward silenced passed. "so about last night" the boy said "I didn't know where you lived and you where to drunk to get there on your own so I brought you here, I don't expect you to remember anything though" he said in a very posh accent.

harry was growing concerned, had something happened between them, did he want to know. "so about that did we well you know" harry asked hesitatingly not really sure if he wanted to know the answer "no, no" he assured him there another awkward silent. "so anyway thank you for everything really, but I have to get going" harry said and he got up to look for his clothes "yeah sure" they boy said "its in the kitchen" he shouted as he saw harry franticly looking for his shirt " It was nice meting you, perhaps we could see each other again, preferably not a drunk" the boy said "emm" harry hesitated he was already to uncomfortable with the whole situation "yeah maybe sometime" "ok then ill give you my number" harry saved the contact as the boy from the nightclub `god he was really terrible he couldn't even remember his name" the boy saved Harrys number and just like that he left.

That evening he went to Hermione's, and cried a lot, he told her everything, form the room to the dancing to the trip, to his chat with Luna, to his adventure with the blond boy the night before. It was all a mess, harry had never done such and impulsive thing before in his life, and even less with another man, what had gotten into him he had no idea, was it the alcohol mixed with frustration. Was it his impulsiveness accompanied by repressed emotions. Or more importantly was it Malfoy. He had no idea.

Days passed and he started to relax more, or at least as much as he could, when trying to forget that everyone was now interested in who the blond boy harry had been seen drunkenly walking with was. Why did everyone had to get their noses where they didn't belong harry wondered. What did they care. What harry had gotten out of the past few days upon reflecting about the hole situation was that he needed more time to understand what was happening to him and that was all right, he tough about calling back the muggle boy, but didn't, he spent the rest of the weekend busy taking care of rose and helping Ron around a bit with the boring paper work from the ministry he had to do on his auror cases, it was no secret he hated doing it and it was really tedious to be honest but harry didn't really have much else to do.

The following Tuesday harry got a call from the muggle boy, he had asked him out for drinks latter that evening, harry hadn't said yes, the thing was he didn't say no either, he lied and told the guy that he wasn't sure if he could make it as he had a job thing to attend to, but would tell him if he could. This gave him time to delivered whether or not he should go. Hermione advised him to go as she believed "it would be good for him to go out and see what happened maybe it will help you clarify some things" she had told him. Harry called the boy later that night and told him he was free. And so they met in a bar, harry had thankfully figured out his name was Oliver, he was 25, had brown eyes and beautiful pale blond hair just like Draco's. The conversation moved along smoothly he was nice to talk to it nice to talk to someone who didn't see him as the war hero or something similar, the conversation quickly moved out of the bar and harry decided on the bold move of inviting him over for a movie at his place. He didn't have any second intentions with that proposal to clarify but he was willing to see what happened, or was he ; maybe. They watched one of Harrys old DVDs, he had started collecting them after the war. Wizards had their own films of course but he had always preferred muggle ones. and needless to say as the pop corn ran out and the movie rolled, one thing let to another and they where making out in the couch, harry didn't oppose he was enjoying it. It didn't take long for things to get more intense his shirt flew across the room but harry was growing anxious "stop stop" he pulled away "I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong idea" he said " Its all right don't worry" Oliver said "is just I've never been with a guy before sorry" harry admitted "oh" there was silence "it all right" Oliver said after a moment, it was awkward at first but they kissed some more and then both fell asleep on the couch.

A few weeks passed and harry kept seeing Oliver every once in a while, but he knew thing weren't going anywhere (in any sense of the world) , manly because he reminded him to much of a certain someone, he was nice and sweet and everything anyone could wish for, but it just didn't feel right. Not at all plus the star of the school year was drawing near and he was growing anxious by the minute, it was no surprise the pictures of Oliver and him in London had already been plastered around the wizarding world news and it was a secret to no one, so either way it was a conversation he was going to have to face as soon as he got back to Hogwarts and Draco wasn't stupid enough to believe that A. Oliver was just a friend of Harrys and B. that the uncanny resemblance to him was just a mere coincidence. So that was something harry wasn't looking forward to at all, and he was frustrated, what was he going to do with this boy, he didn't know, he was going to be away, and it only felt fair to end it, let Oliver go, but he could bring himself to do it.

Maybe it was because Oliver had became a safety blanket from facing his true felling or maybe because having something in the way, harry though would make things less awkward between Draco and him, bad reasoning as it could also have the opposite effect, harry wasn't quite sure what the reasoning behind everything was, he had of course discussed all of this with Hermione who had just suggested to do the logical thing end it with the boy, but harry though she was sometime to stubborn and rational. And well he couldn't to it. It was the last few days before harry had to go back to Hogwarts and of curse Oliver knew he was leaving soon, harry had told him he was a literature professor at a boarding school, but they had yet to discuss what was going to be of them.

And it was overdue to be disused, harry had though about it, a lot, everything would have been so much easier if had just been and asshole, it would have given harry the perfect excuse, what where the odd of meting a guy at a club and him being nice, IT WAS A ONE IN A MILLION, and this exactly the reason why it wasn't fair to him, harry was being the asshole, it wasn't fair he was the replacement, the re bound to a relationship that hadn't even happened yet, no; so against his will harry had decided that because of his strong morality and overall sense of chivalry he had to break it off as much as he liked Oliver's company.

And so they talked, it was a mutual agreement, as they both concluded it had no future. Truth was harry had no idea if him and Draco had a future or even a chance, but he had learned thought experience that some risks where worth taking, and Oliver deserved better, he was to young to naïve, he hadn't been ever as broken as harry had even at his young age, a harry hoped he never would but he had to live a little more, harry knew it was true. And sometimes they say that if you love something you have to let it go, though it wasn't Oliver who harry loved he would soon realise it was the safety the security, that Oliver entailed what harry loved. Because it was scary it was for the sake of comfort instead of for the sake of going for what he really wanted. And what harry wanted, was a different slightly taller, and a bit more broken blond boy.


	8. Chapter 8 back to Hogwarts

Chapter 8: back to Hogwarts.

the dreaded day of the return back to school came, it was the first of September and the Hogwarts express had just arrived to Hogwarts, harry was waiting for the first years at the entrance of the great hall, who where giddy to be sorted, it was a shame how little of them they where, the children of war, and every year the class got smaller, for the time that teddy (who was currently nine) came to school his class would be even smaller than the one harry was stood in front.

The sorting ceremony and the feasts proceeded as normal, well if you where able to ignore the obvious awkwardness between him and Draco that was. harry wasn't ready to speak yet so he instead spend the hole dinner speaking to hagrid about the creature he had cared over the summer, including a herd of jobberknolls he was caring for, he leard he was really exited for about them, but hopped wouldn't be much of a trouble in the future as he explained that when they die they reproduce every sound they've ever heard back wards. Other than that the dinner was pretty un event full. After dinner harry then lead his students to the Gryffindor tower, laid down the rules, and then the dreaded moment finally arrived, he was forced to go to his dorm, and meet with Draco. He did a few rounds around the castle overthinking everything he was going to say, and every possible conversation that was about to happen.

And finally headed to the tower. He found Draco apparently asleep in the sofa next to the fire place and so relived he made as little noise as possible and went to bed fully knowing that, it was a conversation he was going to have to have sooner or later And most likely sooner as it was Friday and the next day for obvious reasons there where no classes. So instead of sleeping harry proceed to overthink everything once more, just in case the other 50 times hadn't been enough. He finally somehow managed to fall asleep but apparently the torture didn't end there ,in fact instead of the usual nightmare about tom riddle he dreamt about kissing Draco and then about Draco melting like a candle on the floor needless to say he woke up in the middle of the night absolute defeated , so instead with a flick of his wand he made himself a coffee got out of bed, he saw Draco had woken up and gone to bed at some point so he instead sat by the fire with book until he managed to fall sleep again by the fire, he woke up the next morning at around 9 and went to breakfast alone, as there where no traces of Draco anywhere, he was starting to wonder if he was avoiding him, so harry decided he would stay in all day. As he didn't fell like doing anything at all.

At around two Draco and Neville arrived at the tower, Draco was drenched in mud and water from head to toe and had his broom stick on his hand. He had apparently been flying all evening and it had started to rain. Draco went inside to get cleaned and harry and Neville chatted for a while until Neville left as he insisted he had to go check on his plants, harry didn't really understand much of it. By the time Draco got out of the sower Neville was already gone and so it was just him and harry, finally, Draco got dressed in clean clothes and went out side of his room with a towel wrapped around his neck, and his hair still dripping wet, the thigh shirt he wore made his muscles visible trough his shirt and harry was trying his best to not stare at him as he made himself some coffee, manually as it was good distraction it seemed, the tension was to much and so harry in a blood move decided to cut the silence with a simple enough question about who his quidditch practice had gone.

He didn't answer for a second, "good" Draco replied, "although It started to rain a lot" and it was kind of awful" he said there was another pause, "how was you summer", harry then asked breaking the silence between them once more, "it was decent , had some fun" It was time, harry knew it Draco knew it, they had to talk bout it. Draco then decided he had to ask, it was killing him, he had seen all the pictures across the daily prophet of harry and this boy , this good dam boy that wasn't him, he hated this boy more than he wanted to admit. "¿but its no me who had an interesting time after the trip is it?" Draco finally said trying to make it sound disinterested and casual harry blushed Draco was trying to play it cool but he need to know he needed to know if harry was actually also into boys or that was bullshit form the day prophet and if they had actually been together? where they still?. Draco had also noticed the boy looked a little like him and could help but to get his hopes up as much as he tried to tell himself it had nothing to with him.

What do you mean? Harry asked knowing full well exactly what he meant, "I've seen the pictures they are every where, so about him. Who is he?" Draco asked "Is it true?". `shit to much 'Draco though to himself. Silence, Draco spoke again, "I though we where friend come on spill it," he said growing increasingly anxious. "Ok fine" harry agreed measuring his words carefully, he took a deep breath, and looked at Draco, "its true, and his name is Oliver." Draco almost let out a cry of joy, so he liked boys! "so what is this you sexual awakening potter" he asked sarcastically to cut the tension, "maybe" harry said, "but its not like it was a surprise to anyone, anyway. at least I wasn't as obvious as you where though" harry said looking at Draco and they both let out and awkward laugh. "So about Oliver?" Draco asked returning to the conversation, "well okay he is a muggle, and he was really sweet, we meet him at a bar, and I was a little tipsy, so that was that". Draco looked at him inquisitively waiting for more. "So you guys still together" Draco asked he heart was going to beat out of his chest he was hoping with every fibber of his soul harry would say no, yes it was an awfully though but he could stand it wasn't him who was with harry, he couldn't take it.

"As a matter of fact" harry paused, this was torture Draco thought "no we are not, I just wasn't ready", Draco let out a sight ,and contained a scream of joy, he tried his best to seem polite and asked what had happened ,harry made up some lame excuse about distance and wizard stuff or something to not tell him the obvious reason of why it had happened. And so everything went back to normal ,Draco was euphoric , so harry as single, into boys and and he finally felt like he had a chance with him , harry on the other had was relived Draco didn't ask about the resemblance of them and he was happy, because it seemed Draco was visibly interested but he count be sure, maybe it was just curiosity, he didn't want to get his hopes up. Not yet at least. And so everything went back to normal. Between them, except everything wasn't normal on the contrary after that summer everything had changed, the problem was they both though the other one didn't know it yet. And so they put on a facade, and went back to discussing books and now a newly found subject "boys" fully knowing the only boy they wanted was the one they where talking to.

Days went by, and though Draco tried to not let it bother him, was starting to grow increasingly anxious around harry, and things where getting really awkward again, he has so desperately tiring to seem normal, and cool, but it just didn't seem to be working, and he sensed that maybe harry was also acting weird but neither of them where very observant about anything at all, and Draco though it was just his mind playing tricks on him, and harry well he wouldn't notices awkwardness and the tension even if it hit him in the head and smacked him across the face. It was frustrating to watch as well, everyone around them could definitely tell, because again the where terrible at hiding their emotions, and they seemed to be the only ones to not know it yet. But its said sometimes love works in mysterious and magical ways, and maybe sometimes does ways came with a little help of Mcgonagall who assigned them to watch over the students doing their astronomy work in the east tower, for a few nights the following week as the professor had to leave school due to a family emergency. And they where also in charged of organizing everything afterwards.

So the next Tuesday as students finished their work and one by one left to go to bed, harry and Draco sat on the east tower watching over them, not saying a single word to each other, it was almost one am by the time the last two students finally left, and harry and Draco where alone, the sat starring at the stars for a while It was taking a toll on Draco being there so confused dealing with this new found emotions, "harry, can I ask you something" Draco asked harry nodded "should I tell someone a secret even if it means I could lose them" he said, harry dwelled on the question for a second "perhaps you should, its not easy to deal with more loss than we have and we try to avoid it, but some secrets eat us up, and its not worth any more pain" he finally said. Draco though about it. He tough about telling him, kissing him right there and then, but he couldn't, he had lost to much, he was to afraid to lose anything else to ashamed, and he wasn't going to lose him to. he wasn't prepared FOR it would shatter him into a million pieces. And so he kept quiet, got up organized everything with the flick of his wand and so they both left the tower in absolute silence. Draco had come to realization that if he had to pretend for the sake of not losing him, he would, and he would do his goddam best at it.


	9. Chapter 9 ice skates

Chapter 9: ice skates

And so thought the following month he went back to normal, not even letting a though of harry slip into his head. And everything went back to as it was before. But it was eating him up inside. October and November flew by, and harry had by this point given up hope, he attempted some things over the last moths but nothing seem to work, Draco shut himself out, every time he did, and so he convinced himself it wasn't worth it anymore, he thought himself a fool. December rolled around and the Hogwarts land scape was suddenly coloured in a layer of white. It was the last Sunday after the students left to go home for the holidays, and so most of them where spending their last day shopping or having tea in the near by town. Draco was at the verge of a break down, he could do it anymore, and so that morning when harry came into his room with a hot chocolate and a pair of ice skates and suggested they'd go ice skating he could not say no, even if all his been screamed it was a bad idea. But he could bring himself to care, not any more.

Harry was surprised that Draco had accept his proposal and was bursting with happiness as he had been avoiding him for the past couple of weeks, after getting ready, they left the castle.

As they got to the frozen lake, Draco started having second thoughts, why had he been so foolish, he didn't even know how to skate "harry I might have forgotten to say I've never done this ever before" he said. Harry laughed "don't worry ill teach you" "if I die, Its entirely your fault" he said putting on his ice skates "cant guarantee you wont" harry replied , "come on it will be fun" harry encouraged him so Draco got up and fell about 3 times till he was able to balance "see your doing great" harry screamed "come on here" he said Draco tried to move towards him but fell yet again harry then came help him up, and grabbed his hands "see your are getting it" harry told him "ill help you ok" just grab my hands and I'm going to star pulling you, ill make sure you don't fall" harry then pulled Draco gently around the ice he lost balance a few times but after about 20 minutes he was almost capable of moving forwards with out falling on his own. From then they started to have fun and teased each other, after Draco was able to move on his own. They threw snowballs at each other and laughed a lot, they didn't even noticed it had been almost two hours when it started to snow.

The storm was getting worse and they had to go inside, so Draco made his way towards harry, still a bit unsteadily and almost fell but he cached him. And they stared at each other. Time lost all meaning and all that was left was the cold snow that fell on the back of their necks the warmth of his breath and green, a green that clouded any rational thought in Draco's head, an for a sheer instance all that exited was this, and so he leaned in; their noses almost touching centimetres apart, he could barley breath, and harry didn't even blink, it was a felling of sheer pure and absolute delight that flooded Draco's body and colluded his scenes and he could keep it in, his felt the warmth of his lips against his own and kissed him. And harry kissed him back And the world dissolved into nothing. His lips where soft and warm against his; and his body melted in to his, Draco's hands on the back of his head tangling into his hair he felt his arms around him frim; tracing his back he indulged in him in the taste of his lips the sent of him; intoxicating; drowning in him. Everything had ceased to exit expect for him, Draco didn't know if a second or 3 hours had passed until harry pulled away and looked at him confusedly.

It was then when it hit him what he had done, his heart fell to his feet, and he held his breath waiting for something to happen. Harry was so shocked he had no idea what to do. And so after processing what had happened and looking at Draco's panicked face he did the only thing he could think of and kissed him again. It felt familiar it felt right; a relived shiver ran trough their body's and flooded them with need with fierce and pure passion; this was Draco had been wafting for; he succumbed to him; Draco's fears all dissolved his arms pulled him thigh against his body and their mouths moved as one; it took his breath away. And they stopped and looked at each other; harry glasses where clouded and where falling down his nose, Draco pushed them up carefully looking into his eyes and smiled it wasn't the biggest smile it was subtle; the most genuine sincere smile harry had ever scene. It was in this moment that harry understood; everything he had ever heard about love.

He understood the fierce passion of that kiss Hermione and Ron had in the chamber of secrets; he understood; what Neville meant and what Remus felt and what his parents felt; he understood everything; he knew that love was the most powerful weapon of all; and he though he understood that before; but nothing had ever felt like he felt right then and there in that moment. That he wished with every fibber of his being that it lasted for ever.

But the snow was to strong and they had to go back in. not another world was exchanged between them afterwards. But it wasn't needed. They both just knew. And so that night, when harry was having a nightmare with out a word Draco slipped into his bed and hugged him they just laid there for hours not saying a world, not making a sound. And to world out there was miles away it was just them, together at last. No more secrets. No more lies. No more nothing just two boys sleeping.


	10. Chapter 10 light and dark

Chapter 10: light and dark

Harry woke up the next morning; the sun streamed trough the windows and bathed the room in light; he turned around to see him sleeping peacefully next to him breathing softly; his body covered in a warm light that reflected of him; like he glowed; harry didn't move; he didn't make a single sound he just looked at him; studied every line every curve every dip; in his back; not quite registering anything or thinking at all.

Every though every emotion every vein in his body; all his attention was being put into this; maybe it was minutes or maybe it was hours till Draco woke up; he turned around and looked at harry; a sleepy smile formed on his face; neither said anything for a while; Draco was looking at harry for a instant until he started to uncontrollably laugh; it was a laugh of relive and of disbelieve; he wondered why he ever worried so much; "why was I so dumb" he tough to himself looking at harry laying next to him. Harry count help it and he stared to laugh to. "why are we so dumb" Draco said in between laughs; harry new exactly what he meant he started laughing and looked at him "maybe we have just learned to be afraid of everything all the time" he said after a while. "hmm or maybe is not that deep maybe we are just to fucking blind" Draco said and then he kissed him; and kissed him and kissed him maybe a million more times; he wasn't letting go; and so they laid all morning in bed the warm sun rays filling the room they cuddled. And watched a movie. Holding each other tight. Not willing to let one second to waits, just existing together;

Because they waited for so long for each other; they needed each other so much; it was everything they could have imagined and more; for the first time; they understood the meaning of the word us. For the first time; harry finally felt; that he didn't need to fight all his battles alone. And for the first time Draco knew; that he was more than his scars more than his past, that not every part of his heart was bad.

The weekend blurred into inseparable images; where time had absolutely seemed to vanish. That was until Monday came; and they where forced to slip back into reality. The semester was over and harry had promised to go spend Christmas back in London; but he was doubting his decision given the circumstances; Draco on the the hand had gotten a letter from his mother she seemed to want to have at least one day during the holidays with her son. But now that this was a thing everything got more complicated. It wasn't about people finding out about Harrys sexuality there had been speculation for quite a while about that; and Harrys concern wasn't that; but what the world would think of this; and this was no to say that there hadn't been rumours of them before but none of them had ever been serious more of a satire no one be lived written by underpaid journalist desperate for any story they could possibly cover.

but this time it was real; this time it wasn't a joke anymore; two of the most well known enemies; co workers; for different sides of the story; who's characters where so build up to and specific persona; an image of who each of them were; ideals they both represented. Fantasies that people created; how will everyone feel when they new; that in this precise moment in a high tower of Hogwarts these two where kissing by the fireplace wondering about how everything was about to crash down around them. When they had to brake the characters.

It was about the stigma; who could you forgive the one who took your parents and a million of children's families. How could you forget what he´d done to you; and what the mark on his arm had meant once; how could you forgive what he did. How could you forgive; and look him in the eye and touch his hand; or give him a chance to hold you tight. How?

Harry hadn't forgotten but he had forgiven; and he understood that those ideal those weren't Draco; he was a broken child once as much as harry himself was; he just happened to be in the other side of the narrative. But the people didn't get this; after all the notion that every hero is absolutely good and the every villain in inherently evil is what people tend to think; truth is not one sided or one dimensional and there isn't just good and bad guys; because hero's are flawed and every villain believes they are doing the best in their mind. Or they are scared and don't know a better way out. But to think people would believe this was absolutely unrealistic; he knew for a fact not many understood this; and that when Ron or dean knew; hell was going to break loose.

For know though it was time to decide. To decide if he was going to London; as he promised or if he was making up an excuse to stay over the break. That is when an idea popped into his head; "so you know I have to go back to London" "do you really" Draco groaned "yes; but I had an idea; why don't you come with me; stay in my flat" Draco looked at him confusedly "well useless you want to stay whit you mother" "no no way let me pack my bags" Draco said getting up "harry wasn't expecting that reaction at all and then he started to realise this entailed more; and it entailed telling people about them. Why was he so impulsive he had no clue. But who knew maybe it was for good. At least they would be together. And outside of the school for the fist time since the summer. And for the first time as something more. And So that evening they boarded the train with the students and left.

Draco had forgotten what it felt like to hide a boyfriend; to hide for everyone around them what was really going on; he had really taken things for granted. Needless to say the last time he felt this way was before coming out. And he didn't miss the felling at all. The fear from the stares, the what ifs and the thought of everything that could possibly go wrong. But this time it was different; it felt strange a bigger and bigger because he knew when combining potter, Malfoy all eyes where placed on them every movement. Form now on. Everything he did next to him was seen. And speculated about.

He wondered if harry always felt like this during his whole life, and the proceeded to understand that he took this stuff harry new so well; and had so much practice with for granted; because he just didn't know, he´d been there of course but never at the scale of the mighty harry potter. They boy who lived. Not once but twice. Once at Harrys flat they unpacked, and stayed there the rest of the night harry made dinner; the muggle way no magic involved; perhaps because he was tiring to impress Draco or because doing things not magically helped him keep his mind of other things and made him feel like he could to something. But either way nothing could help his anxiousness about what he was going to say when they went to visit Ron and Hermione on Friday. In the mean time though. Harry planed to take every second in before thing inevitably had to change. And perhaps everything would fade.

He wasn't certain of what was to come and that was okay, in the mean time; harry spent the days trying and presumably failing to teach Draco how to cook; as he was incredibly jealous of harry ability and couldn't make a meal for the life of him; if it wasn't on this the boys would spend the day watching movies or playing board games (board games on the magical world where also very much cooler than in the muggle world but spiked quite of the same amount of fights a muggle monopoly would; that didn't necessary change) It would not be right to say that this days where spend in hiding because it wasn't quite the case; but perhaps in hand sight they where it just what they needed at the time and going out didn't seem necessary even if behind that was an unconscious decision triggered by the fact that anything that happened outside the apartment was seen; in here it was like they where invisible; and it was clear that harry wanted to be invisible for a little more time even if it was fake

So instead the days leading up to Christmas where spend between all types of kisses cuddles and laughter's. Draco on his part was anxious he had not anticipated in his plans having to tell other people about this ever, it just (yes stupidly) wasn't a though the once crossed his mind perhaps because he never though he wound get this far. So it was evident that the hole matter was making him incredibly upset. After all the prospect of meting with your undeclared enemies was nerve racking Draco hadn't seen much of Ron or Hermione at all after the war; he saw Hermione now and then in the ministry and had spoken to her a few times regarding legal matters about his family but that about it still they where in generally civil good terms .

What really bothered Draco wasn't Hermione as he new she would be supportive and most likely being so inquisitive and Harry's best fried she knew everything or at least most of the story so she would not be surprised. What really worried Draco was Ron; for one he knew (even if harry denied it to calm his nerves) that Ron still wasn't okay with him; he want as easy forgiving and he despised Draco; he had said it before and he was certain it hadn't changed much, to make matters worse him and Ron had not engaged more than a few awkward hellos in the elevators of the ministry and a few blank stares when he had to go to the auros to sort out something and get updates on his family.

Reason why he was almost certain that this would be one if not the most difficult person he though they would have to tell and that it was unexplored territory and Draco wasn't exactly anticipating exploring it in fact not because of anything other than the history of the war; and the fact that harry and Ron where such close friend he most certainly wasn't going to love the idea off them together. And Draco was certain he was going to try and be supportive but he wasn't going to be okay with it; and he was worried this could become a problem in the future.

In fact not many where kind to Draco after all the wounds form the war where recent; and people needed someone to blame; one could not forget what they had done and not many people had the understanding harry had of him; and the willingness to forget; for not many people Draco meant hardly any; if anything after the war all he had where his fellow slytherins; pansy being his rock most of the time like she always had been. The infinite companion he could trust but she was still broken after all; what would have been of the girl who tried to sell harry to the dark lord. People didn't forget easily. She was broken an afraid and the world through prejudice would never be kind to her. She avoided time in Azkaban as she had really committed no big crimes and Draco dared to say out of sheer luck, this made people mad. In reality the world would never be kind to the slytherins kids even if they had been just that, kids.

He still remembered when he came back to Hogwarts after the war to finish his last year and take his exams as he hadn't had the opportunity to do so before and was searching for a sense of continuity and normally that perhaps Hogwarts could give him; and a when it came time to sort the first years a little girl was the first one get slytherin; and the hole room was silent not even her own table clapped and she ran out of the hall crying. It was devastating really. And no one knew what to say. Mcgonagall and slughorn had worked tirelessly to redeem the houses pride; but it seemed a pointless fight to fight. He though about the sheer unfairness of it all. How could the world deem and 11 year old evil because a fucking sentient hat had said so it was unreasonable. But so it was and the world was not fair neither kind to the kids that didn't have a choice but to be forced into the wrong side of the war.

And so he new it wasn't his fault either The way that Ron though was so, because he had suffered and lost his family and a part of himself to. And the rivalry they shared and the understanding harry had of the war was eternally different than anyone else's because as much as his friends tried to sympathise neither of them had to carry weight like harry and Draco had at the age of 16 when they manipulated by people they trusted to be the pawns the weapons of the fight. But neither Ron nor Hermione could sympathise as neither could Greg or pansy. And so it was doomed to be that they would never fully understand. And would think harry out of his good dam mind. And think that after all that had happened this was what you did!. And maybe it all fairness they where right. It was an unhealthy clinging after all for mutual understanding that perhaps no one else in the world will ever fully understand. After all they where one in the same born into destinies they could control. One on light and one on dark. And that no matter how hard he tried Ron would never understand. Because of the fact he had a different version of the war.


	11. Chapter 11 Christmas eve

Chapter 11: Christmas eve.

Harry for his part was starting to wonder if this Christmas was a recipe for disaster. If he should just have though things through a bit more. And not act on sheer emotions and his usual recklessness for once in his fucking life. But what was done was done. The owl was send and tomorrow Ron would wake up to make Christmas eve dinner for all of them. But of course the Christmas eve dinner would be nothing compared to going to the burrow to meet absolutely everyone the next day. It was dread full. He was curios to the fact of why Draco seemed more worried about meeting solely with Ron and Hermione than with the rest of the Wesley's on Christmas day. He would latter find out that what worried him most was Ron and how much he hated him (and to be honest harry could not deny it was true) because Ginny was understanding; and if anyone could get what was happening it was her. Gorge well he didn't speak much anymore. And he didn't have the strength to give a single fuck even if he did show up at Christmas witch he normally never did at all. Percy didn't have much reason to hate him more than a casual person would and he was prepared for that. as for bill and fleur. He was slightly more worried, but deep down new they didn't have it in them to hate him as much. Mr and Ms Wesley's would as always be lovely and in fact everyone in the world seemed to be perplexed but their inexhaustible kindness. And new that molly if anyone would also with a mothers love in a motherly way understand. Bill and his boyfriend a fellow co worker; who had also helped bill bring the dragons into the war would most likely sympathise. Teddy was to young still to understand. And Andromeda had been in Draco shoes a long time ago. And so it was Ron left. The major worry was him. And neither harry nor Draco could ignore this fact.

But it was overdue and so Christmas eve rolled around and the dreaded moment came. And Draco and harry knocked on the door harry was greeted with hugs and hellos form and exited and slightly anxious Hermione Draco could tell. And not many kind words where exchanged. Between them. Draco the pulled her aside and as he had planed made things right and tried in his best of power to apologise. To tell her how sorry he was for being so mean to her and treating her so bad. She took the apology to heart but couldn't still forgive him at all. And she probably never would but for Draco that was enough.

In the mean time harry was in the kitchen with Ron. "so is he here" he had said as he crossed the door harry noodled. "I would really appreciate you to be civil please; he is already had quite enough" "I sincerely doubt it" was Ron's reply "please Ron it already hard enough as it it" "well it was already hard enough for you harry back then; and what did he do but only make everything worse" Ron replied letting fully show how not okay he was with this hole situation. "I mean harry; in all sincerity I don't understand you; must you always be the hero. Must you always forgive and pity" "I don't pity him, let that be clear Ron, but yes indeed I must forgive, when where just children Ron" "and so; just let it be known I don't trust him, but If you will and only for you and because Hermione asked me profoundly I will do my best to maintain civility" "and that would be more than enough" harry replied leaving him in the kitchen to join Draco in the living room. Who seemed mesmerised looking at the little toddler playing in front of him.

"I must not lie to you; he its very happy about your presence" harry told Draco sitting next to him. Of Course Draco new this already Harry then left him to help around the house, after a bit Hermione came into the living room and sat opposed to Draco with rose on her lap. Rocking her back and forth. The little girl laughed and exclaimed in joy. Draco couldn't help but smile.

"so how is the job going" she broke the silence.

"it is really amazing if I might say so" he replied "I'm really grateful for the opportunity; I never though I would get any job after well everything" she smiled empathetically; she had emotion drown on her face Draco could quite decipher.

"and your mother; how is she doing"

"better; it hast been easy of course, with Lucius (Draco refused to call him father) being in Azkaban for live and all" Hermione looked at him attentively while still balancing rose on her leg "but I think deep down she is glad to be doing something; I think she would go insane if she wasn't" the though of asking Hermione about her family coursed Draco's mind but he though it was best to keep of the subject for now. Harry came into the room a few seconds later.

"oh harry; I was just talking to Draco about his mother." Hermione said as he walked into the room. "so anyways; will you be spending any of the holidays with her" she inquired insecurely.

"probably new years but I'm not really sure if I want to see her yet and she is currently at the manor and I don't feel ready to go back there" he said.

Harry noticed Draco was uncomfortable so he direct the conversation else where "talking about it; how are your parent doing mione" "o great; actually I don't know if I told you but they are traveling form Australia tonight to join us for Christmas at the burrow tomorrow." "that is great mione I haven't seen them in ages" harry exclaimed. "will you be joining us tomorrow" she said looking at Draco. "yes he will" harry answer for him, Draco couldn't help but notice a sort of concerned frown drew in Hermione features. But she brushed it of as fast as it had appeared. "very well; ill go see if Ron needs anything" she said and stood up putting rose back on the floor"

"well that wasn't half as bad as it could have been" harry sat on the floor in front of rose "indeed it wasn't" Draco said "do you think she is worried ill do anything to her parents tomorrow; because it sure seemed like it" Draco asked after a while "I don't know, I doubt she really is, she is probably just scared a bit; its hard to let go of the constant worrying; but she means no harm to you I'm sure she cant help it that is all" harry comforted him. Draco just sighted.

A few minute where spent in silence before Hermione called them all to dinner. The conversation was mostly carried; by Hermione and harry; Draco and Ron both participating as little as possible. They didn't exchange a single world in the hole lasting of the meal. Harry didn't know if it was for best of for worse.

After dinner, Ron took upon the the task of taking care of rose who was getting increasingly more irritated. By the minute. And so in the mean time harry took up courage and decided it was time to speak to Hermione. So she took her to the side.

"mione, can I talk to you" of course she had positively replied and had been a little concerned. So they went into one of the rooms "please don't get upset about what I'm going to tell you" Hermione tried to speak but harry looked at her like telling her to let him finish and so she did " I take it you are smart enough to know what is going on all ready; and I beg you to understand; I know he was mean to you; that he treated you like garbage that he shouldn't be forgiven; but he was just a child as where you and I mione, he dint have a choice as I didn't have" a silent tear rolled down Harry's cheek and his voice stared to crack "but, and I know how stupid he feels, he understands me mione. And I cant help it, I need him" he finally said Hermione didn't say a world she hugged him, confused by her own emotions. Of course she wasn't dumb she had suspected it. An it was over due especially after the spectacle harry played the last summer But she wasn't sure how to feel. Could she ever really forgive him she didn't know, but she resulted that it it helped harry to have him, like it did to her to have Ron and rose, then it didn't matter who she felt about him. Instead she transmitted the reassurance harry needed in that hug. And it was done. Know she new. Harry breathed.

After a few minutes they joined back Draco on the living room who was waiting impatiently. Harry nodded to him. And he smiled. Hermione looked at him. "take care of him will you, he can be a bit of a mess sometimes" she said Draco smiled with relief. " oh trust me I know" Hermione laughed "I don't think you do yet really, but if you get sick of him ill have him back" she said teasingly and left to organise stuff in the kitchen.

One down; the rest of the world to go harry thought to himself as he sat on the floor; Draco sat on the couch behind him and ran his hands though his hair. Harry dint know if he was ready for what had to come next. So in silent agreement he encouraged Draco to make small talk with Ron as he re entered the room. And left to check in with Hermione. Who was in the kitchen. They stood in silence for a while Hermione presumably still processing. " he is not going to like it" she finally said "I know mione I know, but what am I to do" "I don't know harry for one time I don't; don't do it know it is to much let it flow naturally and you will know when the time is right, perhaps never perfect; because it will never be; but the best it can be" she told him reflectively. Harry took does worlds to heart and new she was as always right. And he new today wasn't the night.

They headed back to the living room. But didn't go in. to much of their surprise of both it seemed that they where talking to each other. So they made no sound to not interrupt. And listened. Harry at fist though they where fighting but it didn't seem so. "she hasn't shut up it; and it all your fault" said Ron harry was ready to interrupt when he said "all I've hear is about you coming to the burrow tomorrow you know" harry heard Ron say "why" he hear Draco replied. "I suppose because she doesn't understand why you would" Ron said "she seems sad in a way; you know your family being broken, more broken than our at least" "my family has always been broken" Draco replied " it reminds me of how she acted whit harry before you know" Ron said; seemed to harry with out fully realising it. Then there was silence; a really long awkward silence, harry waited to see if they would say anything else but he didn't. so he and Hermione nodded and entered.

She sat next to Ron. And smirked an whispered something in his ear. He smiled. And kissed her. He seemed to whisper something back; it was a bit awkward but harry was used to it by this point. They seemed to be discussing something.

Hermione finally spoke up. "harry we have something to tell you; we where going to tell everyone tomorrow but; I think you deserve to know first." She said "harry didn't understand "and well I suppose you two since you are here" said Ron dryly he was obviously not to exited about his presence at the moment but Hermione was so happy he didn't care and he loved her so much that was all that mattered. "so anyway" said Hermione ignoring Ron's comment WE ARE HAVING ANOTHER BABY" she finally said harry was really happy for them and his heart filled with glee. He exclaimed and congratulated them. Draco did so a bit lest enthusiastically but still genuinely as he could. The rest of the night involved Hermione talking about it. And about how exited she was to tell everyone tomorrow. And so on an on. After a while harry and Draco left tanked them for everything and went back to Harrys apartment.

Harry, worrying all the time about being seen. Harry was satisfied whit how the evening had gone and so it seemed to him that Draco was too still he couldn't help but wonder if he would ever have what Hermione and Ron had; a home with a child and a normal life; maybe he wasn't cut out for it. It had never been his destiny in any sense. Could he ever achieve not being the boy how lived for once. He new this was why Draco made him feel good; he felt he could scape his persona whit him and Draco felt it too ; but deep down he new it was never the same. Even if he tried. He found Draco also laid awake presumably thinking as he was, harry always though that if he made it through the war, he would just marry Ginny and become an un happy auror committed to a love less marriage to a girl he used to love and a job he hated but everyone though he would be great at. And it would be all right normal. And he would have few kids and maybe a secret problem with alcohol and that would be it. But life wasn't always what you expected. He sighted. "are you awake" he whispered.

Draco rolled over and locked at him mmhh he groaned. "do you think will ever achieve normal" harry said Draco half smiled sleepily "nothing about this is normal nothing about about harry potter is" harry was surprised he was using potter he hadn't in a while "but perhaps it is better like that; wouldn't it be boring if it where" harry though about it "I just want to feel like I have a place in the world, not like I am always above it" he said "or below it" said Draco a few minutes passed " I think this is my place right now" Draco reflected "the only place where I fit in this crazy world is here" he said finally harry reflected upon his worlds for a moment,

perhaps he was right, here and now it felt okay it felt right and over whelming felling took over him as he looked into his eyes. "I love you" he said, the words slipping unconsciously of his lips, like they where eager to scape Draco was caught of guard he could believe his ears. His heart jumped on his chest, and he new in that moment that he loved him to and so he pulled him closed and whispered in his ear "I know you do" classic Draco harry though and yet he knew that what does words really meant he smiled to himself his head buried in Draco's chest felling each others breathing he drifted into peaceful sleep. Draco laid awake for while after that. he felt harry falling asleep so peace full so quiet, he looked so young so at peace. And he knew it was right he felt it. He too searched for a sense of normality. And hadn't ever found it until then, he laid awake letting himself indulge in the warm felling in his chest. In the sound of his breathing and in the softens of his hair. Not believing his scenes for one second. Harry potter had told him he loved him. He feel asleep a while later, with the cheerful though that he would get to tease him forever. After all he had said it first.


	12. Chapter 12 crystals and pictures

Chapter 12: crystals and pictures

Draco woke up late that morning to find harry made breakfast. "Merry Christmas!" harry said cheerfully as Draco walked out of the room. Draco was about to keep walking towards the table when harry said "not so fast there, harry said approached him "mistletoe" Draco looked up to the frame of the door still half asleep "do you have to be this cheesy" he said grinning "if you don't want to its fine" said harry mockingly "fuck you" he said and kissed him. "merry Christmas harry"

harry had apparently taken the time to not only do that but finished decorating the entire house. And it smelled like hot chocolate and cinnamon. "well come on, my gift wont open itself" harry said. they had breakfast and then harry went to the Christmas tree and got a small package terribly warped. "who wrapped this a troll" and he laughed "shut up and open it Malfoy" "oh we are doing last names now potter I see" "if you don't stop being such a prick we will, so stop talking for once in your life and open it" and so he did. He opened it not expecting at all what he found inside. He had expected a book of some sort instead he found 2 things in the box; for one it was a muggle cd. Whit a note written by harry. It read in a very messy and thing hand writing

"I know its not a usual gift in the wizarding world, but this cd contains a few muggle and wizard song that are my personal favourite and I think you will enjoy to listen to. Plus; I been tracking for months the song we danced to in that restaurant that one time; and was finally able to find it. So that is here too. Along side a very rough translation of the lyrics to English from Spanish. Btw it is called "como mirate" witch translates to something like "to look at you" or "how to look at you"

He then moved on to the next item. It was in a small bag. He took it out alongside another note form harry. They where two silver chains and at the end of them. Both a piece of broken glass. The second note read as follows

"you might be wondering why this; well the pieces of glass you hold now are form that day at the manor. When the chandelier feel to the floor and mashed to shards They where all over our clothes that day when we aparated and I don't know why perhaps intuition made me keep them as a reminder that you are your family had saved my life. But other than that they are nothing but ordinary; during the war, I had this mirror enchanted with some weird magic that let me communicate with the person who had the other half. After a while Hermione found way to translate that ability to other mirrors and we used them as a way to communicate. So I charmed them with that same spell so that if you look into it I can talk to you form where ever.

Merry Christmas.

Harry.

By this point Draco was crying. He could believe it, he immediacy jump into Harrys arms as a thank you. After a while he went and got his percent for harry witch in retrospective seemed absolutely dumb and insignificant. In comparison. Or so he thought. Harry didn't seem to think so when he opened it. It was a really old year book. Draco had found it a while back roaming in his father stuff in the attic. It was a year book form Hogwarts engraved on the cover with gold letters it said Hogwarts class of 1978 harry opened the book with care.

 _Drear fried and fellow class mates ; we hope this serves as a reminder of more happy times when everything is dark; and we hope the best of luck for you all; against all odds we made it_

\- _Year book committee_

Harry turned the page to find a collage of moving pictures from the school year, there where a few from Halloween Christmas and other holidays it seemed. Some from Quidditch matches and parties. harry was about to turn the page when with the corner of his eyes he saw his smiling mother posing with her best friend . harry stared at the picture for a second it was one he had seen already in a photo book Remus had in his home.

The first pages where pretty standard year book just a butch of pictures of all the students Harry flipped quickly through the pages until he got to the seniors, there staring back at him where his parents and sirius and Remus. They where smiling a waving in their individual pictures. There was also Neville's parents. And some other aurors and members of the order harry recognized. At the bottom of the page with clear neat hand writing was and inscription that read

"have a wonderful summer, Wormtail" love lily

Harry kept passing the pages to find a section with many more pictures. Some he had never seen before. There was a picture of young Remus and sirius on valentines day in 1977, where they where decorating the Gryffindor common room. there was a picture of the marauders in hogsmeade exciting zonkos with hands full of bags. There was a few pictures of his dad playing Quidditch and a picture o each houses team. There was pictures of his mother in one she was in a line of girls who where braiding each others hair. In another she was on the celebration for the cup holding it up James by her side.

He turned the pages to find a new section; named the best of us. Under it were things like the best quidditch player; the best hair; the best couple; best friend group; and so on. Harry turned the page to see a smiling frank and Alice Longbottom under the caption; the best couple. He then saw one that read best friend group and there was a pictures form the marauders harry had never seen before; they stood at the edge of the forbidden forest; smiling and laughing; they where teasing each other; James was behind Wormtail messing up his hair (as he was much taller than he was) and sirus was piggy backing Remus; and trying to make him fall.

Harry stared at the picture for a while tears welling in his eyes; as he saw his mother enter and exit the frame a few times. He turned the page to find one with inscriptions all over it the price for best hair witch had apparently been given to a hufflepuff kid. His pictures was drawn over with markers that put him with devil horns and so. on on the margin there was a note form sirus the said he had been robbed. And others form all of the marauders seconding that claim. Next to that was a pictures of James in his Gryffindor's quididtch uniform holding the cup; for best quididtch player. And a note in the margin form sirus that said something of what harry could decipher about James being the best captain of the century. In the last page there where a butch of notes form other students many harry didn't recognize but was was interesting about this page want that but a picture that was held inside the pages. It was a picture of the marauders outside of the Gordric's hollow house with a bunch of boxes around them and a very pregnant lily recently potter. Who was smiling from ear to ear and on the back there in lily's had writing it said

 _"_ _may 1980 moving into the new house_ "

 _Dear Wormtail; have courage we love you_ _rat_ _\- lily, harry and the marauders._

the world "rat" in sirus`s hand writing that appeared and disappeared every one in a while.

Harry closed the book and looked at Draco "where did you find this" he asked with a broken voice "it was on the attic of the manor; it was wormtails ; apparently he kept it with him; hidden until one day my father found him with it a took it form him and tossed it in the attic. I was weary of if you'd want it, because it was his after all" said Draco "but I though you would so I finally diced to give it to you; I'm sorry I kept it this long" harry didn't say a word instead he just hugged Draco as a way to thank him from the bottom of his heart.

Harry then got up; and cut out the picture of Alice and frank longbottom of the book, and on the back of it wrote;

 _I don't know if you have this picture already but I though you might want it. merry Christmas Neville_

 _Harry_

Then gave it to his owl and it flew away.

Later in that evening harry had just gotten dressed and was starting to get ready when he heard the song blasting from the living room, he went out of the room to find Draco sitting in the floor surrounded but a mess of cables and the cd player harry owned he count help but laugh at the grin in Draco's face who seemed to finally had successfully gotten the cd to play: harry approached him and helped him up he pulled him into his arms ¡; to be fair the song wasn't a very danceable song to say the least; but it didn't matter it haven't mattered then (perhaps because they where drunk) so it wasn't going to matter now; Draco had read trough the lyrics earlier and thought it was coincidently enough a really fitting song even if he couldn't understand much of it.

"y como decirte que no quiero que este amor sea pasajero

que depronto se de un dia y yo te espero"

"how do I tell you that

I don't want our love be fleeting

that maybe one day will be together

till then and ill wait for you"

sounded form the speakers and at some point Draco not really sure why started to cry; and so did harry, in a joined hug of support not really sure why; it was a cry not of sadness; it was a cry of freedom; of love; of grief ; of strength of many things. With a tear framed face Draco looked at Harrys eyes puffy and also filled with tears but still shining emerald green; and and in a broken whisper the worlds "I love you" left his lips and echoed on his ears and seemed to bounce of the walls. "I know you do" harry smirked.


	13. Chapter 13 Christmas at the burrow

As 8 o clock neared the burrow started filling with people presents and the smell of cookies and turkey filled the air; a very cheery Mr weasly greeted everyone by the door; with kisses and hellos; and the tiny living room with crooked walls and Christmas tree with flying ornaments; echoed cheerful conversations and an occasional shared laughter; among the percent; you would occasionally see Ginny enter an exit serving drinks. And bring plates with delicious pastries to the centre table. A wild teddy Lupin ran around pretending not to be trying to sneak a look at his presents. It seemed as if nothing was much changed and Christmas at the burrow had always been the same no matter how bad or how much things had changed. It was the home like warmth and the smell in the air that instantly made Harrys insides warm and drew a smile on his face as soon as they arrived. Harry couldn't have for seen of course and perhaps in this mind set; count even fathom that Draco want going trough the same sensory experience as he was; and therefore he carried away; charged in on the house rapidly forgetting about Draco's presence for a moment. In retrospective leaving him trail behind wasn't the best choice to calm Draco's nerves and neither was harry rushing in to greet everyone; before Draco could catch up to him.

What was really the quite the moment was not the awkward hello with molly and Arthur; but the silence that be fell the living room; second before full of conversation as harry and Draco appeared on the door frame; it was as if time had frozen up for and instead; Draco was half hoping to hear a cricket like you would in a movie. Of course the initial shook could have only lasted a few seconds at most; before everyone re composed ; starting with Hermione who immediately went in to greet harry; followed by and exited teddy lupin who ran down the stairs and jumped at Harrys neck; followed then by the rest of the people percent. Of course the greeting for Draco were far lest welcoming; if they could even be considered as such that is. Sitting in the living room he looked completely our of place; it was like somehow his features resembled dose of a Stanger and make him stand out as the outsider of the group; even fleur who had a rather similar and very pale complexion; seemed normal; she didn't stand out as much as he did.

Of course in polite weasly like fashion; most of percent did their best to make the new comer feel included in the conversation; and harry staid by his side talking to him witch god bless him avoided Draco so much awkwardness. Of course; they were does like Ginny or fleur and Luna who much like harry had an easy time forgiving and soon after bonded with Draco; while they where other like Ron or Percy that didn't want anything to do with the situation; there was also Andromeda who staid with Draco all night of course she understood how he felt; and then they where does who fell in the middle like bill and Charlie who didn't seem to mind much but kept their distance.

At 9 o clock dinner was served and the table even when charmed could barley fit all the people percent; at the far end Luna and Ginny talked enthusiastically about their up coming trip with the Scamander brothers and Luna's father xenofilus; commented to harry about his work from across the table; sitting next to harry was Draco and Andromeda who shared a quiet conversation mostly about harry, Andromeda giving him advise on literally everything. While teddy ate loudly by her side and laughed alongside victory; bill; fleur Charlie and Charles boyfriend Alastair (ally for short) discussed strange magical artefacts; and the other end of the table; Hermione and her mother and molly helped the baby eat and discussed mostly baby stuff and gave Hermione tips; while ron and Arthur where very much questioning Hermione's father about everything muggle. Percy was of to the side talking with his wife

At some point during the meal; gorge made and appearance and sat next to his mother for a few minutes only to grab a bit of food; say hello to everyone and then leave. Of course all the wonder could only last so long that was; before the conversation turned toward the new subject of interest; the elephant in the room; or rather the Malfoy in the room. of course It began with the more polite questions; the typical what have you been up to; how is work and so on; but the questions keep evolving; to more cutting things; Draco was trying to keep his composure; most of the time when asked about his mother; and his family; the cutting stone was of course when someone asked about his father; he of course wasn't in the head space or the disposition to go on a full emotional rant about how he felt about his fathers life sentence. He instead kept eating quietly; but Percy didn't seem to read his body language and kept pressing for and answer; harry noticing Draco's distress simply took his hand under the table as a sing of support; not really aware that Ginny was paying close attention to his actions. Never the less Harrys support was not enough to calm Draco about the Percy's pressing inquirers; neither was molly's death stare as she noticed the situation. Andromeda tried to interrupt and devise the conversation else were as did molly and Luna; the 3 of them unsuccessfully. Draco new that Percy want going to stop so he finally said.

"look I have no idea what you want to get out of this; all I can tell you is Lucius" he paused "my father; " there was silence, he had refused to refer to him as such for years " was a troubled man who did terrible things" Percy stared at him as if waiting for more " and I cant excuse his behaviour; but you'll be well of to know, that I am doing my best to correct his mistakes, so if you'll excuse me" he let go of harry hand and stood up "I have to go to the bathroom." Silence befell the dinner table; after both harry and Andromeda rushed out of the room after Draco.

Draco sat outside of the burrow; thinking; he had tried for so long to avoid such conversations about his father; his dammed father; Draco had spent years with all his being trying to hate him to detach himself form him; to come to terms with the fact that the man he had idolised all his life; the man how had loved him more than anything; and would have given his life for him had done terrible terrible things. His own father; him who 11 year old Draco would have defended to the depts. of hell; was an awful man, it took him years and deep down it still hurt him. His refusal to call him dad didn't come from a place of hate; but of an attempt to dethatch himself from him. To create a believe that he was not the same man that had raised him. The man that he once knew. But the man who had given him of to the drack lord and has done his bidding; who had murdered in his name. it wasn't his father but a hate full bigot that was in Azkaban and he deserved it. Draco told himself. It was Lucius Malfoy in Azkaban; not his father. And so he had dealt with the trials; and the accusations; and his actions; this mind set was the only thing that pushed him forwards trough it all. The single fain believe that that wasn't his father but someone he didn't know who was rotting in a cell.

Never even acknowledging the idea that he had done it to protect his family; he didn't want to let himself think that; and so he called him Lucius; and he wasn't his father. And he remained in his mind as such. And allowed him to keep his memories of him as a child intact; selfish you might argue but it kept him sane and so it worked. Or it worked if he was not confronted with it as he had been that night. Harry of course was aware of how much it affected him to think of his father; and so he knew better but to say anything when he found him sitting out side. Andromeda staid there for a little as well; as she new the struggle it had been for Draco and her sister the sentence of Lucius; but soon left harry and Draco alone as she felt she was intruding.

Harry sat in front of Draco in silence; and carefully extended his hand towards Draco's and held it in his; it was a way of letting him know he was there but giving him his space to process and get up and back in. it was a few minutes if this until Draco got up; and headed inside; almost forgetting they were not supposed to be holding hands Draco let go as they approached the house. At the table the conversation had already awkwardly resumed but paused again as Draco re entered the room; and sat at the table; no one said a word for a moment until molly broke the silence and re started the conversation, after a few minutes the general awkwardness had wore of as and the dinner proceeded as normal; under the table harry held Draco's hand every time and uncomfortable question was thrown at him. He didn't notice though that Ginny could see what was happening until after it was to late; he saw Ginny looking at them for a second and harry let go rapidly; instinctively almost; Draco turned his face to see what was happening witch only further confirmed what Ginny had seen; harry mentally panicked.

He looked at Ginny waiting for her reaction; she didn't say anything she just gave harry a look as if saying is okay and reassuring him she wasn't going to freak out. A breath of relief moved thru Harrys body. Harry looked at her trying to some how thank hew with his eyes; "its okay; I wont tell" she said finally in a whisper; harry was relived and in that moment he knew that Ginny understood; all the thought that followed this realisation where around the ideas of thank good this girl exists and gosh Ginny is amazing. And so on; and so it was done and she knew; one more knew their secret that would slowly stop being one step by step that very night. After dinner everyone gather around the living room to open gifts around the Christmas tree; and pose for family pictures; it was after this that Hermione and Ron decided to announce to the hole family the news of their second baby; and needless to say there was a lot of crying involved mostly from molly; and Hermione's mom that was who where ecstatic with the news of a new grandchild; a boy this time; and everyone cheered for them.

But I the case of Harry's news molly was the next one to know; it was after dinner had passed and presents had been open and the children where as sleep up stairs and most of the adults where conversing in the living room by the fire place. She was in the kitchen; making more cookies and sweet treats for every one. When harry came in and they talked. As harry did with her like a son would with a mother. He told her about his life and his work and thanked her for welcoming Draco to spend Christmas with them on his behalf. And then they talk about him while the cookies baked; harry told her the hole stories of why and how they had ended up I the same room and also about why he was spending Christmas with them. After a bit more rambling it was time; and so harry looked at molly and told her he needed to tell her something and she listened; probably knowing where it was going she let him speak and explain himself; and so she told her. Tears rushing down his face it felt to harry as if he was coming out to his own mother and in a way he was. After he was done molly hugged him; and told him it was okay she was crying a little as well but she told him that he loved him anyway no matter if he decided to love Draco. and harry felt then that no matter what happened it was going to be okay.

And so after harry had clamed down they spoke a little more about it; until the cookies where ready and Arthur waked through the door; harry didn't say anything when he asked what happened; but nodded to molly; to let her know it was okay to tell him. "ill explain latter" she said and Arthur and molly both left. Harry staid alone in the kitchen for a while, before following them inside.

Then is was Luna; harry had seen her go outside as she did; a few minutes before and so he decided not really think about telling her but rather about just talking to her as he really hadn't seen her since the trip and they had only exchanged letters once since as Luna wasn't much of the type to do so. Therefore harry had followed; Draco of course noticed harry leaving the house; temped to follow but decided it would be best to stay behind; Luna sat a moment outside; it was a really cold winter night and harry could see his breath. He sat next to her. "its been a while" she said in her usual dreamy voice; "it has" harry said simply "you look different; worried about something" she said turning her head before focused on the clouds to him and studying him deeply. Harry didn't know how to respond so he remained silent; she kept looking at him puzzled as if looking for something " there is something strange but beautiful about it" "about what" harry asked "about what ever it is making you feel worried; its like its waiting to explode out of you; like a volcano or a star" she said turning her look back up to the sky "so what is it harry" she said but she sounded else were like she want percent but in her thoughts "well there is actually something" he said " remember when we where talking and you told me that if something was meat to happen it would even if it took time; well maybe it did" Luna just kept looking at the sky, "he really makes you happy I can see that" she said; "your don't think I've gone insane do you, because it kind of feels like I have" harry said "not at all; I think you are just as sane as I am harry" he could help but smile remembering the first time she`d told him that ", well know harry, I have to go my father is waiting for me to tell him about what I read from the stars" she said jumping up and heeding back in harry followed her inside.

Draco was waiting for harry at the door but Luna stopped to say something inaudible to him that harry could hear. Harry would later asking but Draco would tell him that he didn't remember because it hadn't made sense; harry didn't believe him of course but perhaps it was better if he didn't know.

It was nearing 11 pm and bill and fleur had just walked down stairs with victory asleep in their bills arms; Draco and harry in the mean time were sitting on the stairs talking to each other quietly as possible; and didn't hear them come down; harry was realising how terribly bad they were at hiding anything at all; and it had been to obvious they been holding hands second before for fleur to notice; she instead just let out a soft laugh and looked at bill playfully "ha, I told you didn't I tell you" she whispered hoping only bill would hear it; but that wasn't the case; Draco cheeks immediately turned bright red. Bill looked at her as a desperate attempt to get her to be more prudent with what she said ; she took the message and they just kept walking down stairs. And passed harry and Draco by. After a few minutes presumably after talking they both came back upstairs having left victory down stairs as they were getting ready to leave. They sat in the stair below harry and Draco and then bill said "hey we just wanted to say" he made a pause waiting for fleur to continue "we are sorry; for before" she laughed a little "but we support you; harry" she said "yes we just wanted to tell you that it is your life so do what ever you want" bill finished "plus love is to be celebrated" he said and proceeded to kiss his wife "thanks" harry said simply it was awkward enough as it was already "well anyway; we better go, good night" they said getting up. As soon as they were gone Draco let out a relived laugh; easing the tension of the moment and harry then laughed along

By 11 thirty everyone had left or gone to bed; expect for Draco harry Charlie and Alastair Draco and harry thinking everyone had gone decided to go to the living room to sit by the fire for a while at least, upon coming down stairs they found though that Charlie and ally had already had that idea and they were cuddling by the fire; they were drinking and chatting about something; before harry and Draco could leave they had spotted them and invited them to come sit. So they did; they talked for a while about Charlie and ally mostly telling them about their recent trips; and their work with dragons, even a little bit about the plans for the wedding; that was apparently in April Harry had learned. But it was mostly small talk to say the least. Of course a few drinks latter both harry and Draco had slowly moved closer and closer to each other and as the cloak neared twelve thirty the conversation would turn more interesting; perhaps because the were speaking more than they should have been, needless to say it wasn't long before Charlie and ally would finally confirm their suspicion of what was going on between them.

Of course it wasn't a big deal; and Charlie even if a bit conflicted with the idea still was not really surprised as he had suspected it anyways ;and who was him to judge he though to himself so instead he resulted to be nice as it was none of his business what harry did and he knew what to be judged felt like; he was marring a man after all in a few months. Ally on the other hand seemed way more curios than Charlie and he keep asking the pair questions for a while; and promising not to tell anything harry and Draco answered as they huddled together by the fire; bill would soon fall asleep and after a bit so would ally. Harry and Draco decided it was best if they went upstairs to a room to not risk been found in the morning asleep together in the sofa. Even if most of the people in thee house already knew. Well expect for Ron. Harry wondered if it had been the best idea not to tell him first but what was done was done.


	14. Chapter 14 Expecto patronum

The next morning Draco woke up really late to find harry had already left; it was almost 11 and he peeked out the window to see harry was in the backyard playing with teddy lupin while Ron Ginny Charlie and ally played quidditch. He got dressed and went down stairs molly had made sure a bit of breakfast was left for him; and it was apparently enchanted to stay warm; Draco ate with great pleasure and went outside to join harry and teddy. The rest of the morning and mostly all of the afternoon were spend outside; it was a beautiful sunny day even for winter time; and there was still snow on the ground from the night before; so the family spend the day throwing snow ball as each other; harry and Draco helped teddy build a giant snowman; and at around 4 pm molly was waiting for all with a warm cup of hot chocolate; as night fell and boxing day was ending they all gathered around the fire; and Draco realized he didn't feel like that much of an outsider anymore. This felt more like home; than anything ever had since he was a child.

That same night Harry had found himself walking down the hall coming down from Ron and Hermione's room to his own; Draco was already asleep when he saw that George`s door was slightly open; he peaked inside thinking he wouldn't see anything; instead he saw gorge had his wand out and was blankly staring at it. Harry knocked on the door; hoping he wasn't bothering; and George snapped out of his contemplation. He didn't say anything and harry was about to ask if he wanted the door closed when surprisingly George spoke. "harry?" "I'm sorry I was just" gorge cut him of "its okay" harry was facing the door ready to leave then gorge spoke once more "actually harry" he turned around "I could use some company" harry was surprised but entered the room anyway "it was drack the only light source was an orb contained in a glass on the night stand that had a white glow; like the one produced by a lumos spell. And the incoming light from the moon. The bed was posed to the side of the room against an uneven wood wall; to the side there was the night stand. At the other end there was a desk with a chair; the walls were bare of decorations and the room had nothing that suggested it belonged to anyone. Other than the fact the bed was messy and the trash can was full.

Harry sat on the chair and moved it to be in front of the bed were gorge was sitting; neither of them said anything; an gorge continued to look absentmindedly at his wand. "can I ask you something" George said after a while harry nodded " when you cast a patronus" he hesitated, "what do you think about" harry wasn't expecting that question but he knew why gorge asked " it depends; but normally" harry sighted "about my parents" gorge staid quiet for a moment "how do you do it" harry looked at him confusedly " I mean how do you get a good memory with your parents, its just; I haven't been able to cant one since; well you know" he looked around absentmindedly "I just think of them being happy and that makes me happy" was Harry's answer witch admittedly wasn't very helpful. "but how can you forget they are not here anymore" George said " the idea is not forgetting; or well at least to me is more about remembering the good times and them being happy, what ever the memory is it has to be something that make you feel a sort of warm inside when you think of it regardless of what happened after So for instance I think of my parents being young and happy; and I think they would be proud of me; and that kind of does the trick. "

There was silence gorge seemed to be pondering over Harry's words "would you like to-, try it" harry suggested after a while. Gorge nodded and carefully pointed his wand at the door. Expecto patronum; he said; but only a mere few sparks came out of the top of his wand. He didn't look disappointed in act it seemed he though it was an improvement. "would you like to tell me what you are thinking about maybe I can help" georged seemed to think about it for a while "I – I'm thinking of him, of when we opened the shop for the first time" he muttered "well at tell me how does that make you feel" "I just remember he was really exited, he didn't know" "see that Is what is stopping you focus of the emotion rather than the outcome" "for instance try to remember how you felt when you were flying of Hogwarts after making fireworks explode during the owls " the end of gorges mouth moved to resemble something like a smile "and now try to remember what that euphoria that you shared feel like; let it fill you; let yourself relive that felling" gorges face drew on it a small smile "and now; do it" "expecto patronum he said" this time though it was different form the top of gorges wans a bunch of blue light illuminated the room and though it wasn't corporeal the light of patronus circled around the room a few times before vanishing.

"it is just a matter of practice, you will get it eventually" harry promised "you cant try again if you'd like" the next few times something similar occurred. By the fifth or sixth attempt the patronus smeed to be taking more of a shape it know had four legs and what seemed like a tail. But it wans fully formed. Gorge decided to give it one last try; he focused with all his forces and said again expecto patronum and just as harry had described to him he let his emotions fill him; and so out of his wand a string of white light formed into a fully formed corporeal patronus. That started to move around the room.

In that moment as the patronus had formed gorge broke down into tears; harry didn't understand at first until he realized; it wasn't his usual patronus but instead it was Fred's; the hyena moved towards gorge and stood in front of him sat next to him and extended one of its paws to touch George; suddenly George could feel what he had felt when conjuring the patronus he saw his memories played back to him and felt a warm felling evolve him and stop his crying. Soon after the hyena banished. Gorge stared in silence at where it had been. Tears rolling down his face "thank you" he said to harry his voice broken the word barley audible "anything I can do to help" harry simply replied; and stood up. "as harry was a the door harry turned back and said "just one thing; a wise man once told me; and you will do well on knowing it; that it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live" he said exiting the room.

As he was reaching the end of the hall he heard George's voice calling for him; and he turned around. He was standing on his doorway signaling for harry to come back and harry did "its just" he muttered quietly as harry approached "I just wanted to let you know" he stopped "no never mind" George said stepping back in his room; harry didn't leave though "what is it?" he insisted "I just wanted to let you know I'm okay with it" he paused harry was wondering what he meant "I mean I'm glad you are happy" harry still didn't understand "I – I - I saw you last night with him, after he ran out of the house" harry now understood exactly what he meant "oh" was Harry's reply "I guess I just wanted you to know I suppose" he said; harry didn't know what to say back. "if I'm honest" George said "I would say that I'm jealous you are moving on very selfish I know ; I hope it works out" he finally said. "thank you" whispered harry the conversation died there; no more words were exchanged and harry left and went to his room.

Harry woke up the next morning; sun light streaming trough the windows; he hear the shower ruining; and realized he had to also get ready to go back to London. For the night just to leave the next morning to go spend the new years at the manor. Or well at least Draco was going to the manor; harry in the other hand he wasn't so convinced yet. It was true he had dragged Draco along to spend Christmas at the burrow; but in any case; it didn't seem like the thing to do; for what he knew; it would be him Draco an Narcisa for a few days; then of all people pansy Parkinson would be joining. And though Draco had told harry that she had change; or what ever; he wasn't quite convinced. he wouldn't get to see Andromeda till new years. heck she might even bring teddy along; although harry doubted it as he knew she hated taking teddy there, almost as much as she hated going; harry didn't know if he where in Andromeda's shoes he would go back to that house himself but regardless she seemed to be trying to make amends with her sister, and thank god for that or Narcisa would have gone insane during Lucius`s trial if it wasn't for Andromeda keeping her company or so said Draco at least.

Draco had already finished tiding the room when harry came out of the shower and dressed; after picking up all their stuff they went to get a quick breakfast down stairs before leaving. Molly of course insisted they stay a bit longer but after giving their goodbyes to everyone they left. Upon arriving harry and Draco singed by the apartment quickly and after went to grab lunch to a near by Italian restaurant harry loved, during lunch Draco talked to harry about going to the manor and basically begged for him to come; harry was still not convinced despite of Draco's begging he couldn't help but feel scared in a way to go back to the manor. And definitely know less that him and Draco had become a thing, he wasn't going to be welcome. And Draco knew this to. Harry saw he needed his support of course but he wasn't sure if he could give it to him. Or they would just end up drowning each other down.

That night Draco went to bed earlier than usual, but upon hours of wondering harry could decide yet what he wanted to do; he felt guilty in a way because he knew if he had been in Draco's shoes he would have wanted with all his being for him to go. And yet harry didn't understand why he was being so hesitant to do it. he sat in the kitchen dirking a cup of coffee absentmindedly casting spells with his wand; he knew in his gut he should go but somehow it felt daunting to do so. Harry though about talking to Hermione but resulted it was not the best idea; she must have been asleep anyway. He wondered what was the best thing to do for hours. It was nearing 11 pm when harry decided to go outside; not really thinking about a destination he put on a coat and left the apartment.

He stepped outside; it was a foggy winter night; and it was snowing softly there was no one to be seen in the streets; and every one in a while a cry would round the corner; harry wasn't think about his actions but something inside him told him there was somewhere he needed to go; so letting himself go; he closed his eyes and aparated. He opened his eyes; to find himself in a familiar place; it was dark harry could se the silhouettes of the Cottages that stood on either side of the narrow road. A short way ahead a golden glow of streetlights indicated the center of the village where there was a tower that rose above the ceilings displaying the church bells; Behind the church, harry saw the familiar cemetery the snowy tombstones covered in blanket of pale blue. The light form inside the church flecked upon the white snow casting red, gold, and green flares of dancing lights.

harry pushed the rusty door leading to the cemetery with hesitation; as if remembering the last time he had been in this place this late at night a very similar evening; a clod shiver ran trough his back; he reached for his wand. He made his way mindlessly across the tombstones until reaching the location he knew well. The white marvel stone shone displaying the names of Harry's parents. To the right there was a much smaller stone; it was also made of white marble and read "sirus black 1959 – 1996 "does who love us never really leave us" on the top right corner; there was engraved a paw.

Harry drew out his want and conjured new flowers on both of the graves; he stood in front them in silence for a few minutes, just staring at the letters engraved in marvel and letting snow fall on his neck. "hi mom, hi dad, hi sirus" he whispered quietly "i know it been a while since I last was here; I'm sorry about that; I know I have to come more often, anyway its after Christmas; and everything has been going wonderfully lately, work is great and did you know Hermione and Ron are having another baby, I know crazy" harry didn't realize the snow had slowly stopped to fall " I didn't now where else to come to, and I realized I need to tell you something, since you are my family" harry took a deep breath; and look around his wand in his hand in case anyone was near " I am dating Draco Malfoy" we whispered "he felt a wave of release across his body "which also obviously means I like blokes but I figure you knew that already; as a matter of fact it seems everyone knew that already but me" he stood there in silence for a few minutes; couldn't help but wonder what would this be like if they were alive he though if they where maybe he and Draco wouldn't be together as he would be a complete different person. "anyway I'm sorry if I disappointed you; and I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner" Harry's eyes started to water but he tied to hold back from crying " mom; I think I love him" he could stop a silent tear from falling as he said this "its madness; I know, mom how I wish I could tell you and hug you, I miss you so much you have no idea" harry cried. "anyway" harry wiped away his tears "I'm sorry mom, I'm sorry surius ; I'm sorry dad, ill promise ill come more often. Ill tell you about everything that is going on I swear" he stood there still crying

In that moment harry heard footsteps approaching him; he holed on to his wand and point out at the approaching silhouette "who are you" he demanded "oh my god harry! The silhouette rushed towards him "you scared me to death" harry recognized it was Draco's voice but he wasn't convinced yet; blame paranoia. He didn't lower his wand Draco entered the graveyard; and approached harry "stop right there" harry said "whoa clam down its me" Draco said "no no; tell me something only you would know, I know tell me; in the tower what song did we dance to for the first time" " magic works; form the weird sisters because you found an old record and it reminded you of the yule back" Draco answer with no hesitation harry lowered his wand slowly. "how did you find me" he asked sharply " I was worried about you back home so I tired reaching out to you somehow; desperately; please don't get mad but" Draco paused "but what" harry asked "I used legimency; to try and see where you were, I'm sorry I dint mean to, I know I know he used to do that to; but I was so scared; something had happened to you" harry was in shock "I didn't mean to; I would have never done it with out you knowing; I should have ever; I'm sorry" "its okay its okay" harry tried to clam him down "just do it again, I could have freaked out really bad" Draco nodded desperately "I'm really sorry I was just so worried; you just left; and I had no idea where you had gone; and so after trying really hard I could get into your head and saw you wanted to see you family and I guessed you were here, I'm so sorry I shouldn't have" "its okay; I forgive you I shouldn't have left like that I'm sorry to" said harry pulling him into a hug.

After the initial shook had wore of and Draco had calmed down; harry had gone back to his parent graves Draco followed along quietly they stood there in silence for a moment; holding hands; snow started to fall again "mom; dad; sirus" harry whispered once more " I'm sure you know Draco, don't worry though he has changed" he said, Draco leaned his head to to harry shoulder " as I was saying before" harry voice has started to grow thin tears welled up in Harry's eyes once more "I think I'm happier than I've been in a long time" he whispered " i wish you where here to experience it, ill be back soon I promise" harry said at last Draco squeezed his hand. They walked away from the cemetery together. Harry still crying.

Why didn't you use the glass; harry said as they reached the end of the street "I think I forgot about it" Draco replied embarrassed but harry was to in his head to notice. They reached the end of the street and appareled back in London. As they got back in bed harry made the final decision; he knew he needed to be there for Draco as he had been that night "ill go" harry whispered in Draco's ear. "he turned around "seriously" Draco whispered back "yes" harry said "he can I ask you something else" Draco nodded "why didn't you use a patronus" he whispered "Draco didn't say anything he seemed somehow ashamed and sad at the same time " harry; I – I cant cast one" he said rolling over, harry stayed awake for a lot longer and he suspected Draco did to but neither if them said anther word.


	15. Chapter 15 the manor

The silhouette of the manor rose above the gardens and casted and ominous shadow; as the car approached trough the wide drive way; the carved iron gates opened with a dry metal creak; leading into the front lawn; where two snow white peacocks walked majestically. Harry`s nerves tensed as the car circled the fountain and parked on the front door. the doors of the car opened by themselves allowing them to step out side; the driver made a hand movement and made their luggage disappear; harry only could assume to be appear back in their respective rooms. He took a deep breath and squeezed Draco's hand once more before letting to go and they both stepped out of the car. The frond door swigged open; as they reached the top of the stairs; harry could hear the rustling of the metal gates closing behind them as the car drove away.

They entered; Draco closing the front door behind them. The entrance hall was dark; dimly illuminated by a fain yellow bulb; and the light that streamed trough from the end of the hall; the celling's where high; about two or three meters above Harrys head; the walls were decorated by moving paintings; although unlike the ones at Hogwarts; they didn't seem to speak. The floor was of dark black wood that creaked each step they took. At then end of the hallway two stair cases lead to the upper floors; and to each side; extended another hall way; Draco turned right flowing the light source; and entered trough the only open door at the left; giant windows extend from floor to celling with a view of the back garden; and plenty of sofas and chairs where placed in the room; a giant chandelier hanged from the celling. To the left there was a chimney; it was made of white marvel and above it carved in stone the Malfoy family crest stood. To the right of the chimney in a green arm chair was Narcissa ; she put down her reading as he heard them come in. "hello mother" Draco said coldly signaling harry to do the same "good evening Narcissa " harry followed "Draco, potter you finally made it" she stood up from her chair and approached her son. " what a delight; did you have a pleasant trip" "yes we did" Draco said "make your self's at home" she signaled for them to leave. As she sat back down by the fire.

They turned away; harry followed Draco back and up the stairs. Draco walk to the end of the hall and pushed on one of the doors; light streamed in "this was or well is my room" he told harry. As he entered and signaled him to follow. The room had windows that went from the celling to the floor and had a view over the back gardens. In the middle a king sized bed stood flanked by four carved wood posts that held up green curtains. The room had its own bathroom and chimney as the one downstairs the Malfoy family crest was carved above it. On the left wall was Draco's library staked to the top with books of all kind looking as if about to explode. The walls had a few framed posters, one of a guy harry could only assume was Draco's favorite quidditch player when he was younger. And some with the slytherin crest. Other than this there where no other indications the room ever belonged to Draco.

Draco plummeted onto the neatly made bed. Harry was still awkwardly standing in the door. "I wont bite" Draco said harry awkwardly came in an sat on the sofa. "I think you where given the room directly next to this one according to what my mother said before; I assume your stuff will be there." Draco said. " want go check it out" Draco said getting up. The room next door was almost identical to Draco's; except there was no library or handsome quidditch player posters. Draco saw harry distressed face. And closed the door to avoid unwanted intruders. And pulled harry into a kiss "I know is not ideal" he whispered "but thank you for coming" he pulled away. "anyway ill go organize my stuff" Draco said "also" he leaned in and whispered into Harry's ear "the beds are big enough for two, don't worry I wont leave you alone" he walked away; leaving harry alone.

He was left to Roam around the room. He organized his stuff; and wandered around the drawers and the bath room. Having nothing better to do he lied in the bed and feel asleep. He was awoken by a knock in the door; Draco came in; not sure how much he slept for; well come on then; ill give you a tour" he said. Harry dizzily got up he tried unsuccessfully to make his hair look decent, and adjusted his glasses. Draco stared at him for a moment; he was so messy so the opposite of Draco who was always so well put together but seeing him like this made him go crazy. He just wanted to push him against a wall and make out. Damn him, Draco stopped himself; and tried to regain his composure as they walked down stairs.

"this is the main hall" he announced "to the left at the end of the corridor to your left is the kitchen; and the first; smaller library; he said guiding him down the hall; he pushed the door open letting harry see the library. To the side there are meeting rooms; and that sort of stuff but they haven't been used in ages" he said as they returned to the stairs. "underneath the stairs the doors to the ball room opened letting them in; harry remembered the last time heed been there. A cold shiver ran down his back; he looked up the celling the chandelier had be replaced by a new one; he gulped upon seing the stone stairs that lead to the dungeon. "anyway" Draco said walking retiring to the main hall; to this side is the living room he signaled to where they entered before to meet Narcissa ; and at this side the dining hall; he said opening another door. harry recognized the chairs and the table and in that moment he swore he was going to faint. He had never been here before but he felt as if he had seen this same hall in his dreams about Voldemort meetings a million times.

"are you okay" Draco asked growing concerned "its nothing" harry said walking put as fast as possible. "and this is my favorite Draco said opening the last door at the end of the hall "the main library" harry was in shook. The library was two stories why with bookshelf's that rose all the way to the celling's; spiral stairs leading up to the different balconies and the second stories; across the room was a giant glass doors leading to the garden. That created a sort of inner patio; Draco open one of the doors guiding harry outside. The garden was neatly taken care of; it was designed like one of a French palace; harry could see several fountains and white peacocks strolling along. Draco guided harry between the paths flaked by tall bushes that gave the garden a sort of maze like air; but far less intimidating than the other maze harry had been in. Harry wondered how pretty this garden would have been in spring time.

They walked until they were far away from the main house and Draco let harry to his favorite spot; it was an area enclosed by trees and tall bushes; in the center there as a carved tone bench next to a fountain. What harry didn't know is Draco had saved the best for last; the green house; was surrounded by the withe snow it looked like out of a movie; on the inside; roses tulips and orchid of every color grew; and a few blue butterflies flied around; in the center of the green house was a glass cupule was held up by white marvel columns decorated with gold. In the middle there was a marvel fountain; and a yellow canary bathed at the top making a cheery melody. The gravel on the floor making loud sounds as they walked around. Harry and Draco sat in one of the stone benches by the fountain; flaked by roses. Enjoying the sounds of the birds and running water that echoed on the glass walls.

" I got a surprise" Draco said whit a flick of his wand a picnic basked appeared next to him on the bench "its nothing big; but he said puling out plate; I made this myself; like you though me; your are so much better but I tried" harry smiled from ear to ear. this boy harry swore would kill him one day. He couldn't help himself as well no one had ever in made him feel so special and loved before. I mean secret magical green house picnic was next level for the hopeless romantic in Harrys heart. Never before had he felt so good about anything; never before had harry experienced such a intense felling. And he knew in that instance that this fire that burned inside his soul the crazy passion and desire that Draco riled up in him; had always been there. Even in does times he didn't want to admit it. no wonder it hadn't worked with any girl before. Or with anyone for that matter. Because no other was capable of creating such a riot in Harry's heart which such a simple thing as home made cookies.

No one made Harry's stomach jump; every time their eyes meet across a room; or made his head feel light and dizzy; with a smile. No one had the ability to strip him down with world and make him blabber. He wondered had they not been in opposite sides of the war would this had happened years earlier. Well damn that stupid hat and damn the war for all the time they made him loose. For all the time that he wasted despising this boy. Obsessing over everything he did with the excuse he was evil. Harry wanted all of it every second to be sawn into memory every touch every laugh every kiss to be engraved in his memory. As if somehow that would make up for all the years they fought of hate of resentment. All the years that could have been. And they staid in the green house till night fell; not caring if anyone would miss them back at the house. Just taking in everything. After all harry knew how felting life was. And he wanted to make the most of it. he would go to hell and back again for this boy. He didn't doubt for a second if it came to be he would do it all again; all the pain; just for this moment. Just for this boy This messed up beautiful; blond boy. Little did harry know that he would soon learn that hell wasn't that far away after all. The boy who lived would never outrun his past.

...

Hello, sorry for the time it took to get this up, i really love this chapter hope you liked it to.

any way, leave me a comment if you want.

i will be getting the next up soon.


	16. Chapter 16 pansy parkinson

**warnings:** mention of sexual assault.

...

As the nigh drew upon on the mansion diner was served; Narcissa sat on the left of the head of the table; the chair was left empty; and harry stomach flipped at the though of him being sat there conducting one of his meetings; harry and Draco sat opposite to Narcissa . The room was silent. The only sounds where the occasional clinging of the cutlery as they ate. It was a long and awkward diner. Neither of the present eager to say a world. It took all the way till desert was served for Draco to finally speak out; his voice resonated across the room. With an echo " mother" he said making sure to measure his words "when are the other guest arriving" he questioned "well if you must know" she said "Astoria and her fiancé will be here on the 30th I believe; Ms. Parkinson; will be arriving tomorrow night; and my sister" she turned her head to look at harry "I'm afraid she hasn't said yet; but I think shell be here only for the 31" she finished and resumed eating. A few more words where exchanged between Draco and his mother about the accommodations for the new years gathering. Nothing to interesting.

After dinner harry and Draco went up to their respective rooms to get ready for bed with out there being any suspicion raised. Draco waited for about half an hour to be safe; he made sure to mess up his bed covers; making sure it looked like he slept in the bed and silently sneaked in Harry's room. He could help but fell like a teenager again when he used to sneak into his first boyfriends room back at Hogwarts. As he laid next to harry than night he told him about it. he told him the stories he never told to anyone before

He told him about how they would go into empty classrooms or bathrooms to see each other or wait till everyone left after quidditch practice; and Draco would deny anything all the time. Even to himself at times, he remembered telling himself it was just this one boy. Because he was a bit older he was a sixth year and Draco was in fifth and he was taller than him, and was kind to him as things started to get bad at home. And he had blue eyes and brown hair, and he never wore his tie properly; and he used to steal his scarves and wear them because they smelled like him. And it was also Draco's first heart break as one of his friends accidentally found out, and he denied everything and blamed Draco. And the boys parents got involved and found out he had a thing for boys and they pulled him out of school, and send him away because this couldn't be their beautifully pure blood son Because the prestigious yaxley blood line wouldn't be corrupted by him. Draco would never see him again but he would see the boys father tree more once on day that he became a death eater and the mark was engraved on his arm as he stood along the other death eaters the second time he would see him would be in the room of requirement as he stepped out of the vanishing cabinet Draco had fixed and the third time. He would see him death on the floor in the battle ground.

He told harry that then in his sixth year it turned out it wasn't just this one boy. And he was desperate and confused and alone. And he needed more than anything some human touch and he found it in drack corridor in lonely nights. And empty bathroom stalls; where he would meet with two different boys; one was a seventh year, a ravenclaw. And Draco new he was using him just for sex but he didn't care. He craved it; he needed to feel something. The other was a slytherin. And he was younger and also scared. His mother had been killed and his father had recently taken the mark on his arm, and he was confused and alone And perhaps Draco was using him. And from the seventh year Draco would hear from ever again. But the slytherin would be hit in the battle because he ran around looking for his father, and got hit by curse in the head because he still had his green tie on. And didn't know yet how to defend himself. He had been 16 years old.

He told him that after Dumbledore`s death; Draco couldn't do it anymore; he stopped eating for months and he had found yet another boy. And he was sweet and kind even during the war times; and he would sneak him onto the hupleuff common room some times. And Draco comforted himself thinking that if they made it out alive. He last name was still on the stupid twenty eight list and perhaps a miracle would help them survive. But he had died fighting by Harry's side. And after what had happed in the manor when he went back to Hogwarts but he didn't have a wand; and was so unhealthy he could barley stand he was brought back home because time was up an the battle approached. And the manor was always full of hooded figures that came and went. And sometimes at night; one of them would appear in Draco's room. And he never could say no. And he never knew who he was. But he hoped he was rotting in a cell in Azkaban felling as miserable as he did; when he woke up after dark nights when he had prayed not to wake up.

And after the war had passed. And he had fought to get the slytherin boy a decent resting place, and had stood alone in a grave yard as they buried him. He cried like he had never before. And he promised himself he would live for them both. And so it took him three years to come around; and after his father had gone to Azkaban he decided to tell the world who he was and came out. but he keep his heart on the line. he wasn't going to get his heart broken again. And then he meet a boy; and he was sweet and he was kind; but he would come around and do exactly that; toss Draco out like trash; because he was scared to be touched and asked him to wait. And he didn't have the time.

And so a few years went by and he had pieced together his heart time after time; and started dating again; and with time; he would come around. But his relationship would never worked out. for much. And form then harry knew the story. His last boyfriend had cheated and he had gotten a job at Hogwarts, and then there he was. And when he was done harry held him thigh, as he cried. In his arms. And Draco had just given harry his heart to do what ever he wanted, Because nothing had ever felt so right. And he knew that when the time was right. They would choose to entirely give themselves; and their body's to each other. But Draco wasn't ready for that. And harry was the first boy in his life that didn't mind. And that night he had the best sleep he had had in years curled up in harry potters arms.

As the sun rose over the hills and casted light onto the room Draco would slip out of Harrys arms and make a quick jump across the hall. And he would sleep for maybe half an hour more till the other side of the bed was so empty and cold he could not stand it anymore. And so the day would begin and just as the last he spent it by Harrys side; because only he had the ability to bring light into the darkness of the manors halls. As night started to fall; the front gates of the manor swigged open with a loud creak and pansy Parkinson step out into the front lawn. Her hair was cut really short it was probably shorter that Harry's hair and the ends where died a drack blue. She wore all black and harry could see she had tattoos covering the entry of her left arm most of them moved around some how. At the door Draco waited for his old friend he almost made her fall as he jumped to her when she came inside.

Draco introduced harry to her as if they never knew each other; as an attempt for them to have a chance to re start and create a new relationship between them. Even if he knew the odds of it happing were slim and it would be a very difficult task. Harry had done his best to prepare himself to give her a second chance and put their old conflicts behind. He knew that when she had screamed out into the great hall to give him out to the drack lord it wasn't on malice alone but more so on the fact that he like him thought that his death would put and end to it. she had only wanted to stop seeing the light leaving her friends eyes. As harry had. So harry told himself that it it was true that she had changed for good she was worth giving a second chance. Some would say he was to forgiving but it seemed to be part of his nature after all. In any case he decided to leave Draco and his best friend alone to talk it out. because she was like Draco's Hermione and if there was something that harry could understand was the kind of relationship they had.

And so the night when on; and harry went to bed; harry could only guess it was past midnight when Draco sneaked into de bed next to him; it was dark and Draco had tried his best not to wake him up; little did he know harry had just been staring at the celling for hours on what seemed like and interminable night. Harry could barley see; he did want Draco to know he was awake so he pretended to sleep; after about another half an hour had passed harry noticed Draco's breathing begin to be irregular; at first he just tough he was having a nightmare; soon he realized he wasn't asleep; but rather doing his best to not alert harry that he was crying. Harry didn't move he knew Draco didn't want him to know he had cried and he would be embarrassed about it so he remained still; trying to figure out what ha triggered this reaction; the obvious thought was of course the house; and family stuff; then a much darker though creped up on Harrys mind he wondered if Draco cried in silence like this often but he was just sleeping and he didn't know. He brushed of the though convincing himself he would have know if it happed often and blamed the conversation with pansy or something else. Never the less he staid up till he could here Draco crying anymore and even then he couldn't conceal sleep till what seemed like an hour latter. And even then though wasn't pleasant and was awaked by nightmares several times that night; he fortunately managed not to wake Draco up. But by the time morning rose around he had gotten barley 3 hours of actual sleep. Giving up on failed attempt to sleep further he got out of bed at around 8 am and wandered around the room till Draco woke up and hour and a half later. And the pair headed down for breakfast.

It was a chilly morning and everyone in the manor seemed to be agreeing on the fact that least interaction as possible was best. What stroke harry as wired was that even if spend indoor wandering the various halls of the mansion. Most of the time in the giant library by the fire place. He never saw pansy once. He was left to wonder what had happened between her and Draco the night before but sense he also seemed quite distant harry though it was best not to ask. Fortunately the arrival of Astoria and her fiancé was drawing near and harry hoped it would serve as a way to cut the tension in the environment to have more people over even if they weren't expected to arrive until very late that night.

As diner time drew closer harry noticed Draco was starting to show sings of being anxious pacing around the room and fidgeting nervously with his wand as he offend did when something was bothering him. Still harry was unsure if he should say something so instead he pretended not to notice, and told himself he would do so until he couldn't ignore it anymore. That was until Draco rushed out of a room. Harry didn't follow him but instead decided it would be best to let him go and ask latter about it. after about fifteen minutes Draco burst into the room again he was distressed and the expression of anxiousness was now more prompt on his features. Harry knew then he couldn't just ignore it anymore. "what is going on" he looked over to Draco who was sat on the bed frantically fidgeting with his wand; "is everything all right? " he asked still there was no response

"did something happen" he asked once more "harry let's leave right know" Draco said finally looking up form the floor. His wand still moving fast between his fingers "what?" was all harry would think to say " yes yes lets go I don't know why I ever though this was a good idea" Draco said; rapidly "would you care to explain" harry said in a attempt to get something that made sense out of him. Draco didn't respond he instead paced the room from side to side "what is going on?" harry asked once more "Draco" he empathized, but there was still answer. To any of his questions he kept pacing around the room rapidly. "DRACO" harry screamed Draco stopped dead on his tracks and looked at harry. "would you care to tell me what the fuck is going on" he said once more. "Draco stood still in the middle of the room; he didn't say anything he instead tried to steady his breathing " I - sorry" he said finally "I shouldn't have made you come here in the first place" he said "I really did think she had changed harry" "what happened" harry asked "its complicated" Draco simply responded not wanting to talk further about the situation "look all you need to know; is we talked and it was good for a while or what ever; you know it felt like she was there for me again as she been back in the day; and then I told her about you and she lost her good damn mind" he said "point is she might tell my mother; and I don't know how to stop her; thereof; we have to go" he concluded harry didn't say anything.

No no; fuck this hole situation; harry told himself; this bitch wasn't going to do it; harry didn't give a second though; and he just left to deal with the situation on his own; as we walked down the hall enraged he walked to pansy's door. she had apparently been asleep but harry could care less about that. He was going to have a talk with her. "what the fuck potter" she said in a mildly annoyed voice "what do you think you are doing" she said growing increasingly angrier "shut up will you" harry said simply "look; I don't like you I never have; I think I've been clear about that" he said pansy tried to interrupt but he just continued speaking " and I don't give a single fuck about what you think about me or the decisions I make with my life and what I decide to do with it" he continued "and among does things; is who I'm with; and if you don't like it fine, perhaps you think he's gone insane; never the less for an alleged best fried you seem to care so little about your friends well being and happiness over your own self motives it astounds me; look unlike you I care about him deeply . So my point is; I don't want you to love me; for god's sake hate me for all I care but if you really are such a good friend as you think of yourself you'll have the decency to stop being such a self centered asshole; and demonstrate him that you also care about him and respect what he decides to do whit his life as he has respected what you have done with yours. but what do I know right perhaps go of tell the entire world about it; you can wait and see how it destroys him." He finished and left the room. Closing the door loudly behind him.

"we are not leaving" harry announced walking back into his "but" "but nothing I don't want to hear it; I came all the way out here to this horrible place to spend the new years and I'm not leaving before that happens" harry said definitively Draco didn't speak anymore. It had been just a few minutes of silence when one of the manors house elves materialized in the room to inform the that dinner had been served. As the nights before it dinner was quite and awkward; if any chat was to be hear it would consist of a question and then a simple yes or no answer no more no less; the questions varied on two highly highly interesting topics; the exciting nature of dinner arrangements and the thrilling discussion about the menu for the celebration. harry had began to question what the world celebration meant in the Malfoy residence but he had a felling it would be the exact opposite of one. Nevertheless he was content with the dinner as pansy hadn't dared to speak a word during the hole meal; which meant that either she was waiting to say something about them latter perhaps during the new years party to be the cherry on top of the cake of a terrifically awful holiday it had been at the manor. Or the option harry had opted to go for; his enraged rant had actually had and impact on the bitch.

It wouldn't take long for harry to get confirmation on his speculation.


End file.
